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The Batman Of T.J. Maxx Dishes Out Vigilante Justice On Unsuspecting Shoplifter

The shoplifting epidemic in the United States is real. At least according to the videos I've been seeing on the internet lately. Every day I see a new clip of "customers" in broad daylight walking out of stores with entire armfuls of merchandise. They don't even do the courtesy of hiding it. They walk out of the store with zero threat of being caught, as the low-level employees at Dicks Sporting Goods, T.J. Maxx, or wherever are not being paid nearly enough to stop it. If I was a retail employee, I would be the same way. You're gonna have to pay me more than $16.50 per hour if you want me to fight crime. Some stores legitimately have a "no-chase policy", where employees are literally instructed to let shoplifters walk right out the front door. I learned that from Atlanta.

So who is going to put a stop to these crooks? Luckily, we have a hero in our midst.

What a scene. The Batman of T.J. Maxx. Never in a million years did these thieves think this murdered out, grey-haired gentleman was going to stand in their way. That's never happened before. What type of vigilante psychopath takes the time out of their shopping day to stop a woman with a fistful of purses in the name of T.J. Maxx?

Make no mistake about it. This man is a maniac. I only say that because I saw some random doo-wop singer who has no affiliation with Barstool post this tweet this morning.

I only bring up this stranger because the replies were quite unkind to him. They did NOT appreciate him calling this man a "maniac".


I'm not sure why I'm taking it upon myself to defend this take. I want to be clear that T.J. Maxx Batman's idea to stop the shoplifters is morally good. Shoplifting is ruining stores across America, and his heart is in the right place (I think). I'll give him credit for doing more than 99.9% of people are doing. He's certainly doing more than what the people who are supposed to be solving this problem are doing. But if you're taking shoplifting matters like this into your own hands as an innocent bystander,  you 100% have maniac blood in you. It's dangerous as hell. You have to be a maniac to impulsively fight a criminal. Even if it's a woman half your size. Criminals carry guns nowadays. If that woman whips out a knife and catches him in the wrong spot, it could be lights out for that guy. 

What I can promise you is that you will never catch me dishing out vigilante justice at a national chain store like T.J. Maxx. Unless I own the store myself, or it's a small business that I have an extremely personal connection too, the most I'm going to do is post a video (that I took from a safe distance) onto the internet in a cheap attempt to go viral. 

Maybe T.J. Maxx should just hire this man on the spot. They could hire a slew of these maniacs. If you want to stop shoplifting in your store, you need someone on the payroll like this who loves a good confrontation. There's plenty of people out there who fit that mold. People who leave their house in the morning just looking for a fight. Nothing would make their day more than an opportunity to chase someone down in a public parking lot and tackle them from behind. There's no shortage of people (i.e. maniacs) who would kill for this opportunity. Hire one of them. Let them patrol the store like a secret shopper, and unleash them on anyone who tries to rob the place. Soon enough, word will get out that stores are employing secret maniacs. Criminals will learn that if they're going to shoplift, they're going to have a maniac on their ass.


Problem solved.