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There Was An Empty Void In Our Life Last Night Without Anything Good On HBO's 8pm Slot

Picture this: 

It's Sunday night. For the last 4 days, you have done nothing but eat, drink, gamble responsibly and ignore anything and everything regarding work, family and other responsibilities. You have a family sized pizza on your coffee table in front of you, a proportion of food that is ironic considering you live alone, sans your free loading dog that wants constant attention, table scraps and exercise. 

As the day progresses, the scariest of the scaries start to set in. You come to the crippling realization that you dropped WAY too much money over the weekend and you're now staring down the barrel of 5 straight days of work with every second that passes. 

Your heart starts racing; you immediately think of ways to not have to go in the next day. You google, "fake death certificates" and start to consecrate a scheme for a new tragic death of your great aunt you met 16 years ago and not since. After the crippling realization sets in that there's nothing you can do to get out of slaving to the man for the next 5 dayss, this pops on your TV: 

And instantly all is well. The edible has fully kicked in and you know that you're in for a FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC next 60-80 mins. All is well that ends well, and typically your weekend ends GREAT when you see this audio logo pop on your TV and hear it pop through your speakers. 

That's what makes HBO the greatest TV channel of all time. The majority of the greatest shows ever held the 8pm CST HBO slot when they were airing: Sopranos, The Wire, Game of Thrones, Eastbound and Down, and so on and so forth. I haven't even gotten into B-level shows like Euphoria and The Last Of Us - B level shows that were fantastic in their own right. 

HBO is better than (old) ESPN, Comedy Central, (old) MTV, Freeform. Better than EVERYTHING, and landing it is yet another reason I'm the greatest snake drafter in the history of the universe. 

What else was picked? TUNE IN BITCH and Subscribe to Barstool Chicago on YouTube while you're at it