Cue the Duckboats | Championship Collection for Banner 18SHOP NOW

Advertisement

Dana Holgorsen Says He's Not Worried About Being On The Hot Seat Because He Has A 'Fucking Impossible Buyout'

Houston Chronicle — Hot seat? What hot seat?

That's the message from University of Houston football coach Dana Holgorsen, albeit in much more earthy language.

Entering his fifth season at UH, Holgorsen in 27-20, with last year's dip to 8-5 after a 12-2 record in 2021, his high-water mark on Cullen Boulevard.

Ending a season with an Independence Bowl victory in Shreveport is probably not what Cougars fans had in mind, but Hologorsen touted that win to end the 2022 campaign and the previous year's Birmingham Bowl triumph in a wide-ranging interview with The Athletic on UH's move to the Big 12 this fall.

“We won 20 games in two years,” Holgorsen told reporter Sam Khan Jr. after dismissing his spot on an ESPN list of coaches on the hot seat in 2023.“We won bowl games in back-to-back years. I have five years on my contract with a f------ impossible buyout. … So there ain’t no f------ hot seat in my mind. There just ain’t.”

The buyout clause in his contract calls for Holgorsen to be paid 100 percent of his total base salary and nonsalary compensation through the 2025 season plus 60 percent of the final two seasons. He is slated to make $4.3 million in 2023, $4.4 million in 2024 and $4.5 million in 2025, $4.6 million in 2026 and $4.7 million in 2027.

This is the definition of king shit. Dana Holgorsen isn't the least bit worried about getting canned, because Houston would have to cut him a $19 million check to go away. Now that's job security.

I feel like I've said this on this website several dozen times, but there is no better job in the United States of America than being an FBS head football coach. You get paid a ton of money to work and you also get a ton of money to get fired. Then once you get fired, you go do TV for a year or two while still collecting huge checks from your previous employer until you get another job with another comical buyout in the contract. It's an unlimited money glitch.

Every coach obviously knows this, but Holgorsen is willing to just come right out and say it. He'd probably love to get fired. He's making the same amount of money for the next three years anyway, so who cares? I'd dare a school to fire me, too.

This is the life. Raise your kids to be football coaches.