Mad Dog Russo Goes On A Completely Out Of Touch, Rich Person's Rant About Flying Coach That Is Somehow Still Totally Relatable
This, my friends, is what you call threading the needle. I don't care how you feel about Mad Dog the guy is a shit talking hall of famer and this is just another example of why.
I don't watch these daytime debate shows because I cherish the last few brain cells I have after years of partying. But I do love me a good Mad Dog clip when it lands on my Twitter timeline. And this one is no different.
Mad Dog is in complete disbelief that Tom Hoge would fly in coach after finishing 3rd in The Players this weekend. Hoge is the 24th ranked golfer in the world and had about $5.3 Million in earnings in 2022 alone. After watching Full Swing on Netflix, I just assumed all these guys flew in private jets, dated rockets, and had wicked forehead tan lines. But apparently for Tommy, only two of the three are true.
Quick side note: It doesn't even matter that Russo is pronouncing Tom Hoge (Hogey) correctly. For some reason it sounds wrong when he says it. But that's part of the allure isn't it? It almost feels dirty to agree with him yet you find yourself nodding along in the affirmative as he rants about why hot dogs should be classified as a vegetable or some outlandish shit.
"1.3 Million to FLY COACH?! Has anybody flown coach lately? Has anybody been on an airplane lately? WHAT A DISGRACE!"
He then goes on to boast about he came back from the Caribbean and has a great tan form the tip (nbd). But even though he sat in 1st class he was ASTOUNDED by the crazy things "these people" (poors) bring onto the planes.
"THEY BRING LUGGAGE! THEY BRING TUNA FISH SANDWICHES! THEY BRING BLACK COFFEE THAT SPILLS ALL OVER THE PLACE!
They have all these bags. They put the bags in the first class compartment when they're sitting in 36F!"
First of all complaining that people bring bags on a plane is objectively hilarious. What the hell is with these heathens?! Why don't they just buy a new wardrobe when the plane lands like the rest of us?! The only items in my carry on luggage are a Wall Street Journal and vials of infant blood to help keep me looking young!
I have also need been on a plane where someone brought tuna fish sandwiches, but I have seen the viral post about that dude eating ribs.
I'm actually way more impressed that they purchased that much food from an airport restaurant. That had to run them a couple crips Benjamins easy. These people are rich and probably sitting with Mad Dog complaining about how the poors behind them smell like cans of StarKist and are breathing too loudly.
This rant also gets bonus points for him looking like a whacky inflatable tube man whose heart is about to explode from high blood pressure.
The magic of Mad Dog is that I can't relate to a single thing he is saying but somehow I am in total agreement. I completely sympathize with his rich person, first world problems. They need to drag those fish sandy munching Neanderthals off the plane by the collar of their Nascar t-shirts and clear some room for our guy.
After all, he needs his beauty rest on the way back from his luxurious vacations. He has a long day of screaming into a camera about nonsense ahead of him.