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Dump Em Out: Maids With Their Tits Out Are Getting 300 Dollars An Hour

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Just another example of the gig economy. But rather than deliver food or drive people around, Sammi, a Tampa Florida Woman, has discovered her talent. She’s a topless maid. Now before you jump into this career path it’s always good to know what to expect. Sammi breaks it down in a video.

5 houses in one day at $300 an hour plus tips. It’s the tips I’m not sure I understand. Some of the tips are more than her hourly rate. She must be really good at cleaning houses. To make sure nothing goes wrong, she employs a security guard who waits outside in the car. She breaks it all down for a daily take of $1,430.

Man, there is some big business in the tit game. Nearly every day you see some blogs, tweets, or tiktoks about folks who are using them ole thangs to enrich themselves, and, fellas, I do not blame them. 

300 dollars an hour is lawyer money. You can work a few days a week and be doing fine. Well, more than fine. You'd be well into the top one percent of earners in the US. Think about that. 99 percent of people cannot and will not ever make the amount of money she makes for cleaning with no clothes. Fucking genius.

Plus, you can take this kinda business anywhere on earth. Wanna take your tits out in Monaco? Dump em out. Wanna use those tits in Paris for some extra spending money? Wee Wee. Tits are fine there and I think they are even more encouraged. You wanna take a little vacation and just not clean that week but still dump em out while in an exotic location? They are yours. Dump em where ever and whenever you want to. That's the beauty. They are your tits. Show them or don't. That's your choice and what a choice it is. 

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Trust me. If I could get 300 smackaroons for dropping my trousers and having my shitty dick swing slightly while I scour pots and scrap scallions off a skillet, I'd have my pants off faster than I did the first time I was getting a consult for my vasectomy. Turns out that was inappropriate during the consultation but nevertheless, my dick was out and I got no money. I just got some old dude that put disinfectant on my wiener and flopped it around like an earthworm. 

No one really wants to see a cock but a HUGE number of people want to see tits. By my calculations, 65 percent of all humans love a nice set. By the way, I cant stop saying cock. Cock makes me laugh, man. It's such a good word. Cock. 

Well done, cleaners. Well done. 

Cock.