These clips were going viral on Sunday morning, so I threw them on the blog for anybody that missed them. Here's a YouTube recap since Twitter has been wonky today.
A couple things I took away:
1. I cannot believe that slap was only a year ago. I'm not sure if it's because I'm old or because time stopped being real roughly three years ago. But I would've bet my life it happened in 2021.
2. The amount of content to come out of that slap has to be more than every other Oscars moment ever, which includes when they announced THE WRONG WINNER FOR BEST PICTURE FIVE YEARS EARLIER.
Every piece of content posted about anybody involved in #Slapgate did crazy numbers, Chris Rock pretty much has a couple of minutes of standup for the rest of his life bringing this shit back up if he wants, and now Will Smith is suspended from the Oscars for 10 years (which is admittedly absurd just typing out).
Looking back, I wish I slapped the shit out of Large because that would've had Podfathers numbers go through the roof instead of it getting cancelled (the old definition of cancelled, not the new lame version). I will not make the same mistake again if the Powers That Be at Barstool threaten to turn off the lights in the basement. Especially since Robbie deserves AT LEAST a slap for this take that offends me as much as a man as it does as a Snack God.
3. If anybody slapped me on live TV, let alone someone taller than me, I almost definitely would go full Ric Flair.
At the very least, my voice would've cracked the next time I spoke as tears welled in my eyes. Which is why I have to get the drop on Bob Fox when I slap him as a ratings ploy while defending all the other delicious candies that are better than Banana Laffy Taffy.
4. I always found it interesting that Portnoy always said he doesn't like stand up except for Chris Rock for some reason. Not that Chris Rock wasn't an absolute monster in the late 90s considering this was a first ballot Hall of Fame album.
5. I don't know why a mic drop has such gravitas, but it really does. The mic throw down seems like a bit much. But it feels like the only move you can really pull after calling the guy that smacked the shit out of you on live TV a bitch since a simple drop of the microphone probably won't suffice.