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Building The Perfect Wisconsin Golf Foursome Now That The Badgers NCAA Tournament Hopes Are Done

Paul Sancya. Shutterstock Images.

These words may come back to haunt me and Old Takes Exposed may go get my ass realllll quick iover the next two weeks. But it's safe to say the Wisconsin Badgers will not play in the NCAA Tournament. 

Since 2000, The Badgers have missed the NCAA Tournament just once. It's insanely impressive what Bo Ryan did for all those years, and then honestly what Greg Gard has done to keep the ship sailing. Gard was in a tough spot taking over for such a legend. But he's made the tourney every year (other than this one), including 2 Sweet 16's. Some people razzed him about not making the second weekend last year in what could safely be called the worst video in company history. 

But Gard has been super reliable for Wisconsin since taking over, and up until yesterday had the Badgers fighting tooth and nail to make the tourney with an at large bid. That changed rather quickly as Hunter Dickinson drilled a 3 to send the game into overtime, where the Wolverines would gut out a home win. 

It's officially NIT time in Madison. No if ands or buts about it. Time to enjoy the NIT, and then as people have said in cringey videos … hit the golf course. 

But not all things about golf are bad. Did your season end in pain? Yes. Would you have much rather made the NCAA Tournament? Yes? Are you pissed? Yes. But life is all about playing the hand you are dealt, and the Badgers were dealt golf cards. Thems the breaks. 

I'll say it again, golf can be awesome though. Especially when you do it with your friends. Look at the Barstool Classic … sold out in every city. It's a blast. Nice weather, comfy polos and shorts, maybe a speaker going, a cigar, some High Noons , laughs etc. In the 5-6 times I can play Golf a year it's always with close friends, usually in an outing, and it's a blast. As it should be. So while Badger fans, alums and staff are likely upset about not making the tournament, I am here to cheer you up thinking about how much fun a foursome could be. 

Picture that you are a Badger alum, or fan and you are building out the dream foursome to enjoy your time off. Who would you pick? Who would be the 3 other guys (or girls) that would be a fun hang for a day of 18 holes ? Who would make you laugh? Who would be the people that would make the door enjoyable? Who would provide memories you tell your friends about for years later? 

I think I have some names. 

Here's a few that I would consider "finalists" but wouldn't make my top 3. 

- Andy North 

Two time US Open champ, would 100% help you on the course but would also shoot way too well for a guy like me who shoots 99 on a good day. Pass. 

Bradley Whitford

I don't think he will enjoy all the Billy Madison references. 

- TJ and JJ Watt

John Biever. Getty Images.
Icon Sportswire. Getty Images.

These would be the two toughest to pass up. All things considered, they seem like cool guys, and would have a bunch of laughs. You could get candid convos on life in the NFL, funny locker-room stories, talk about Frank The Tank or Jersey Jerry, or rip on Den R*l being such a weirdo loser. I also feel like given how big and massive they both are you may see the longest drive of your life. 

- Chris Farley

Obviously Chris has been dead a long time, but you have to pay homage to one of the funniest guys in history. Can you imagine 18 holes with a guy like Farley? You would need 4-5 pairs of pants as he would make you piss your pants laughing in them. He would 10000% be a top choice to play with. 

My choices:

1- Greg Gard


I would have to pick Greg in my dream foursome because of the joke I made, and also because given Wisconsin's success it's very rare he would be available to play again in the next few years. I also think part of the joke is that Wisconsin basketball is now looking for golf courses, so Gard would have to be included. 

2- Bob Uecker

This is a no brainer. Bob Uecker is without a doubt the guy built for a day on the golf course. Dirty jokes, funny stories, ripping on each other would be nothing but laughs. Add in his time in the bigs, and all the years in the broadcast booth, he would be a plethora of tidbits, one liners, and pieces of advice that would be priceless. Bob Uecker is built for the golf course. 

3- Big Cat 

First off he shot a 72 at Shinnecock. 2nd, he is very loose and wants to laugh. From a guy like me who has struggled to laugh it off, being around someone like that on the course would be a good day. If my time on mini-golf was any indication, a full 18 would be a blast. He's likable , he can mix it up with anyone , and all in all he wants to have a good time. 18 holes with Big Cat seems like a great day. Add in Uecker , Gard, along with myself and it would be a hoot. 

There it is. The dream foursome in Madison. Maybe one day we could run it back after a National Title…but not likely.