US Troops Are High On Opiates And It Has To Stop

If you can believe it, the Department of Defense came out this week and said drugs are bad. So much so that they released a memo that will ban poppy seeds and no this is not an episode of Seinfeld

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Leave it to the military to ban something that is readily available across the world and often served in dining facilities to our troops:

"Recent data suggests certain poppy seeds varieties may have higher codeine contamination than previously reported," said Gilbert R. Cisneros Jr., the undersecretary of defense for personnel and readiness. "Consumption of poppy seed products could cause a codeine-positive urinalysis result and undermine the department's ability to identify illicit drug use."

This comes as something of a surprise for the department. At one point, some meals ready-to-eat contained lemon poppy seed cake, and dining facilities often served poppy seed salad dressing.

Also in some interesting news - if we can raise just $5000, Kate agreed to let us eject her out of a fighter jet so we have that to look forward to this year.

My venmo is Captaincons. Enjoy the episode! 

P.S. Chaps would really like it if you emailed him today at chapsmcnealy@gmail.com and told him you miss the mustache