Live EventBarstool Sports Picks Central | Thursday, April 25th, 2024Watch Now
RNR 24 - PPV Replay Available to Order Until May 5thBUY HERE

Post-Divorce Gisele is Working Hard to Put Out That 'I'm Doing Just Fine' Energy

If I've said it once I've said it infinite times. My major issue when Tom Brady left us - besides the fact he, y'know, left us - was that he didn't suffer for it. Not even a little. No angst. No regret. As Steely Dan phrased it in Haitian Divorce, "No hesitation. No tears and no hearts breaking. No remorse." He just skipped off to a new, perfect life under the palm trees, without looking back. Throwing to wide open receivers in the end zone and winning in the postseason, seemingly happier than he ever was here. That was his unpardonable sin. 

Well now that he's gone through a real divorce, it would appear he's getting a dose of that bitter medicine:

Source - Gisele Bündchen is focusing on her career following her Oct. 28 divorce from Tom Brady.

A source close to the 42-year-old supermodel says that Bündchen is "starting over in a good frame of mind" and that she feels "confident, strong and better than she has in a long, long time."

"She knows she made the right decision in her life, and is focused on her career and her kids," the source adds of Bündchen. ...

The source also reveals that "Gisele will do what she needs to do and go where she needs to be, and I think that includes the Met Gala red carpet." 

Again, let me remind you that every, single report that has come out since the breakup process began citing "a source close" to this once-perfect couple has been deadballs accurate. Which is probably a good indication that these calls are coming from inside the house, so to speak. That Gisele is either putting them out there herself, or having someone in her life do it for her. Meaning she wants these things in the public conversation. She's happy to be starting over. Good frame of mind. Right decision. Best for her, her career and the kids. And fuck yeah, she's going to go stag to the Met Gala where she and her plus-one ruled the red carpet for so long:

Giphy Images.
Giphy Images.
Giphy Images.

She wants it known she's a strong, fierce, liberated independent woman who can cup her own perfectly spherical ass cheek, thankyouverymuch. "All the honeys who making money, throw your hands up at me," and all that. And this particular report seems perfectly timed for a moment when her ex isn't so "where he needs to be." In fact, he has no idea where that is:

Look, I can't claim to be an expert on divorce. I've never had the displeasure of going through it. (Though even after almost 30 years of marriage, I'm not spiking that football just yet. There's got to be a limit to how much dumbassery my devoted Irish Rose is willing to put up with.) But it seems to me that on some level, it's a competitive sport. Maybe you can't measure happiness in this life. But you can measure happiness against the person you blame for ending your marriage. If you want to come out of the split feeling good about yourself, you have to be better off than your ex. Looking better. Dating better. Doing better in your career. Winning the competition for your kids' affection. All of it.

And with that, Gisele has thrown down the gauntlet. She's going to start working on the career she put on hold for him, look amazing in a designer gown at the Gala, post a dozen pictures a week of her frolicking with the little Bundchens on some idyllic beach in a tropical paradise, and generally let it be clear to everyone she's doing super awesome. And it's going to only get better. 

Meanwhile, her (for now) unemployed husband is one and done in the playoffs, discussing his uncertain future in salty language and fighting the NFL over a lousy $16,444 fine for playing dirty:

There's a long way to go for these two. But the early rounds have most definitely gone to Gisele. Brady is going to have to start rallying. And soon, if he ever hopes to win this contest.