We Need To Talk About These Chips From Prison Called "The Whole Shabang", Which Might Be The Best Chips In The World
Quick backstory here. Last week I was in God's Country, Colorado, for a ski trip disguised as a company retreat for my hospitality group's annual EOS meeting.
We made a run to Walmart to stock up the house and our designer lead Dylan grabbed a couple of bags of Zapp's Voodoo chips.
Now, if you've yet to ever try these, either this blog won't make any sense to you, or it will be lost on you.
Zapp's Voodoo chips are absolute fire.
As the man who helped blow Dot's Pretzels up a few years ago (nbd)-
She was so kind that she reached out and let me interview her about how she got her start making pretzels for her friends parties, her husband and kids, and delegating them to baking duties in a friend's commercial kitchen overnight when her business started to ramp up via local gas stations and hardware stores.
Around a year later they were acquired by Hershey's for $1.2 BILLION (yes billion), (nbd), marking a true American success story. I couldn't be happier for such a great and hardworking family.
I say this all to lend credence to the fact I know my shit when it comes to snacks. I am by no means in Clem's league, as that man wrote the book on snacks of all kinds, but I'm no schlub.
As an early adopter of Dot's, I wasn't the least bit surprised when they went nationwide and exploded.
What I am surprised about now however is that I'm late to the party on these "Whole Shabang" chips, and that they aren't massive already. And I'll tell you why.
But first, back to Zapp's Voodoo Chips.
We're sitting around housing the bags of Zapps watching the first episode of "The Last Of Us" (more on this in a following blog), and I'm going on and on about how unreal Voodoo chips are, and how they're the best chip out there taste wise.
If you've never had the pleasure, Zapp's Voodoo's seem to be a combination of BBQ and Salt n Vinegar flavored chips. Kettle cooked. They are straight fire.
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For some reason, I can polish off an entire bag of them no problem, but the next day my mouth is all sorts of fucked up. I don't know if its the vinegar or what, but my mouth feels like I scrubbed it with sandpaper when I wake up.
As I'm rambling about all of this, my business partner Mitch speaks up and asks if I've ever had "Whole Shabang" chips? When I asked what the fuck is that he replied that they're better than Voodoo Chips.
Nobody else in the room had ever heard of them either.
"Well Mitch, if they're so good, how the fuck has nobody heard of them?"
"Because they're prison chips" was his response.
Wait, what?
So I guess Large, Vibbs, and Coleman talked about these a couple of months ago on Twisted History, but yes, they are indeed "prison chips".
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NBC-If you’ve heard of The Whole Shabang potato chips, chances are you’ve been to jail.
That’s because the chips — which taste like a combination of salt and vinegar, barbeque seasoning, and a little bit of every other flavor ever known — are not sold in stores. They’re “jail chips,” meaning they’re produced and sold exclusively for America’s prisoners.
Driven by their desire for the chips’ apparently unrivaled taste, formerly incarcerated snackers have set up Facebook fan pages, message boards, and auctions on eBay to try to snag a bag on the outside. The Keefe Group, the chips’ manufacturer, even recently set up a separate online store to meet the consumer craving.
“You won’t find another potato chip that packs more of a punch than the Whole Shabang,” said Terry Workman, the chips’ self-described “biggest fan.”
“The Whole Shabangs are a ray of sunlight in the very cloudy and drab existence that is prison,” another former prisoner told NBC News.
Large texted me last night after seeing my tweet and further confirmed not only their availability in America's prison system, but that they are indeed "elite chips".
There you have it. Tell me I don't know my elbow from my asshole, but just know you're also telling this man he doesn't know what he's talking about either…
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When I tell you these chips are good enough to do whatever it takes (buy on Amazon) to get them, I'm not playing around. You thanked me on the Dot's. You'll thank me again on these.
If you've already had them, congratulations on your release, and you already know how legit they are.
These chips are very similar to Zapp's Voodoo in that they are definitely a mixture of BBQ and Salt n Vinegar flavor. But they aren't kettle-cooked like Zapps, and they also have a little something extra sprinkled in. It could be a dash of sour cream n onion powder, but I'm not sure. They also have an "Extreme" version that are wavy ruffles and have a little heat to them. Nothing too extreme, not going to set your mouth on fire like all the burning hot stuff that's on shelves now, but definitely a nice twist. I also highly recommend them.
I plan on bringing a box by the Chicago office later this week so those louses can try them. I'm confident once they do their Chip Snake Draft will be voided out and they'll redraft. No joke.
Here's a video NBC did on them a couple years ago that somebody on twitter sent me.