Daniel Jones Is The Hottest Player In Football After Being Named Nickelodeon NVP, Having "Vanilla Vick" Added To His Football Reference Page, And Causing Teammates To Go Nuts By Doing The Griddy After Practice

Clem1/20/2023 4:45 PM

Name a quarterback having a better week than Daniel Jones. You can't.

I've been driving The Danwagon so long, I honestly don't know when my guy is actually doing well or it just looks that way because I am sauced up to the gills on the DJ Kool Aid. But I think it's fair to objectively say that Daniel Jones is, as the kids say, on one.

Wearing the crown of slime is an honor that only the best of the best players receive (along with the not-so-great players that Pardon My Take occasionally stuffs the ballot for). A beautiful goober like my sweet Daniel officially getting an awesome nickname like Vanilla Vick officially added onto his Pro Football Reference page is something that even I couldn't have imagined happening the night all those boos rained down on draft night. And Danny Dimes allegedly getting his griddy on then causing every man on the roster to lose their mind is like something out of a Friday Night Lights episode right before the big game that the Dillon Panthers somehow pull out at the last second.

I say allegedly because I saw the tweet caption, the red jersey, and what appears to be the best performance of the Griddy by a nerd that once went to Duke. I need someone to pull the security camera footage for the aerial view because getting a clear shot of Daniel Jones getting his Griddy on is such good juju for the Giants, the Barstool Sportsbook would probably have to lower the line to at the very least a Pick'em.

Even without it, I think it's fair to say the vibes are immaculate before kickoff in a little less than 36 hours.

That son of a bitch Joey Langone knows what I'm talking about!

The last time I felt this good about the Giants going on the road in a divisional playoff game against the division opponent despite being a 7.5 point underdog was 15 years ago and we all remember what happened then.

Here's one more stat for good measure.

Along with some good juju.

I read this as G-Man: Daniel Jones number, Eli Manning number, which caused my heart to soar. However my pal Mike dropped some knowledge on me that hit even harder.

Let's get fucking hyped Giants fans. Anything positive that happened this season was found money considering the state that The GM We Do Not Speak Of left the salary cap. But he left us a handful of absolute studs to a stud GM like Joe Schoen as Brian Daboll coached everyone the fuck up. Now we have a chance to cash this season in for a trip to the NFC Championship Game.

The Eagles haven't seen this Giants team because of injuries, a meaningless Week 18 game, and a QB riding an absolute heater. Plus as we learned last weekend, playoff games against a division opponent can get a little close for comfort for the favorite. So why can't they fuck around and ruin a dream season down I-95? Because as a wise man once said another year that the Super Bowl was being held in Arizona...

The NY Football Barstool Store just got restocked since orders are coming in hot. Get your shirts now so you may have them for a "Big Game" in mid February.