Brian Daboll Confirms He's Not Jesus, Claims He Can't Walk On Water Because He Would 'Sink Like A Son-Of-A-Bitch'

Look at this beautiful, beautiful man. Answered that question perfectly. This is where we are when we lived through Ben McAdoo's villain haircut, Pat Shurmur and Joe Judge (combined with Jason Garrett). You win a playoff game on the road, exceed expectations all season and you get compared to Jesus. Now, I went to Catholic school. I understand how Jesus works. He performs miracles, something that Brian Daboll has done while saving Daniel Jones with THIS receiving group. 

So I'm only 50-50 on this answer. I don't *truly* believe he's Jesus. But I also don't completely think he'll sink like a son of a bitch until I see it. I need him to go to the East River with The Wonton Does and try to walk. Donnie has plenty of experience being in the water surrounding New York City so it's a match made in heaven. 

If he wins a Super Bowl in his career? I'm putting this right below the cross in my house

I know the haters of which there are plenty will try to remind us of 1st season Ben McAdoo to 2nd season. I'm here to tell you that won't happen because Brian Daboll is a bald. He can't go get a villain haircut and ruin the franchise. He has Joe Schoen. He has dance moves. He has, dare I say, grit. He's the man we've been waiting for. A bald, beautiful man to be the face of the franchise. 

Win a Super Bowl and I'll listen to a case to make him a Saint.