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Popping The Water Bottle On A Michigan Goal Is As Disrespectful As It Gets

Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce you to Nela Lopušanová. The 14-year-old Slovakian who is currently DUMMYING the U18 women's world championships. 

It's one thing to pull off the Michigan in a tournament against girls who are all 4-years older. But to violently murder the water bottle in the process? That's just cold-blooded. And speaking of cold-blooded, that's how all of her goals have been so far in this tournament. 

This goal against Japan was gross. 

Between the legs. Quick little flip to the forehand. Top bunk. See ya later. 

How about a shorthanded breakaway against the Czechs?

She currently leads the tournament with 7 goals and 3 assists in 4 games. And when she's not dominating a tournament against girls who are all 3-4 years older than her, she's playing in the top U16 boys league in Slovakia. She's played 10 games in that league so far this year and has 15 goals and 16 assists. 31 points in 10 games against the top U16 boys in Slovakia. 

Just as a quick comparison here, Juraj Slafkovsky was the 1st overall pick in the 2022 NHL Draft. When he was 14-years-old he also played in that Slovakian U16 league. He had 54 points in 23 games. Nela Lopušanová is on pace for damn near 70 in the same amount of time. 

Nela Lopušanová 2022-23:

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Juraj Slafkovsky 2017-18:

All I'm saying is that when the 2026 NHL Draft rolls around, that might be enticing in the 6th or 7th round. 

@JordieBarstool