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NYC-Based Think Tank "Zulu Bravo Tango" Releases List Of Alternate Methods of Electing Politicians

Unless you've been under a rock, you've caught a glimpse of the circus currently playing out with the US House of Representatives. Before you click out of this blog, THIS ISN'T GOING TO BE POLITICAL. It's important as citizens to understand the basics of our government especially when there isn't a School House Rock song to explain. For those unsure of how we elect the Speaker of the House, click the video above because Kate does a good job of breaking things down Barney-style to understand and even includes a neat little jingle. 

Bottomline, they've been through 10 or 11 (I honestly lost track and that number will probably be wrong by the time you read this) votes and things remain deadlocked. Why does this matter? Well, aside from making our government look like a clown show, we can't do any sort of governing until we have a Speaker. Put your personal political beliefs in a sack because a respected think tank just released an interesting list of new methods to elect politicians. 

Zulu Bravo Tango is a think tank based in NYC and yesterday one of their members provided options to our government for new ways to elect officials. Let's have a look at the list and break down the viability of each:

  1. Capture the flag
  2. Kickball
  3. The Dozen Trivia Competition
  4. Survivor Flip Cup
  5. Hot Dog Eating Contest

Now, I was as shocked as you are to see these as actual recommendations to elect people to the highest offices in the land. But alas, this is what they gave us so this is what we break down.

Capture The Flag

I love this idea because everyone in Congress is old enough to have played this game growing up. In this instance, the outgoing Speaker of the House would hide the flag somewhere in the Rayburn Building. Whichever team locates the flag first gets to name their Speaker. No votes, just pure childhood wits. Anyone who's been in that building can tell you it can get confusing. Given Pelosi's ability to hide things, this could be a tall task. 

Kickball

You just know so many politicians were picked last in gym class. They sat on the sidelines afraid to get in the fray. You want your person elected? You better get in the mix. I'd personally like to see more athletes roaming the halls of Congress. 

The Dozen Trivia Competition

Can you imagine The Dozen LIVE from the floor of the House of Representatives?! Move over State of The Union, Mr. Jeff D. Lowe is present for 12 rounds (as he Vince McMahon's his way down the aisle). Listen if you can't tell me that's Thomas Jefferson face-mashed with Betty Ford I don't care for your opinion on anything else. 

Survivor Flip Cup

This idea is great for two reasons really: it is still a very democratic method of electing someone and as a bonus it's a great way to connect to your younger constituents. Knowing the stories I've heard about folks on the Hill, I think you'd be surprised how well some members would fare with this game. 

Hot Dog Eating Contest

This one struck me as odd at first because what does eating hot dogs have to do with governing a country? To that I say, if it's good enough for Coney Island on the 4th of July, it's good enough for D.C. First to 218 dogs gets to run the show! 

So there you have it. I placed these in order of viability in my opinion. Many of you are probably thinking, "Cons, these are ridiculous ideas." To which I would say you're absolutely correct, they are ridiculous ideas. But tell me how they are any less ridiculous than what's currently going on...I'll wait.