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HOLY SHIT, THE METS JUST SWOOPED IN AND SIGNED CARLOS CORREA TO A 12 YEAR, $315 MILLION DEAL IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT

Blogger's Note: I wrote this at 3 AM so I apologize if it is less coherent than my usual nonsense

Yup, we have officially left planet Earth. When reports hit that the Giants postponed their press conference for signing Carlos Correa, a bunch of Mets fans joked that it was a sign Uncle Stevie was about to swoop in and sign Correa. 

Then we heard about the medicals, figured the Giants and Boras would figure something out, and then BOOM, Stevie Claus delivers Carlos Correa to Mets fans while visions of sugar plums danced in their head at 3 in the goddamn morning.

Giphy Images.

I'm not sure what the Giants saw in the medicals, but i'm choosing to believe this is the case.

This is once again the part of the blog following a massive Cohen contract where I say I know winning in December doesn't mean you win in October. But I also think having good baseball players on your team is better than not having them, no matter how preposterous your payroll is.

Reminder: Steve Cohen once spent $141 million on this.

Now Francisco Lindor gets his pal at the hot corner, the Mets get another legit bat in the lineup with big time October experience without giving up any prospects or picks since Correa didn't have a qualifying offer attached, and the only thing it cost them was money, which Steve Cohen has a shitload of.

As great as I feel, my heart does go out to Giants fans. Missing out on two players you were willing to pay $350+ million to who then went back to New York must be devastating. Speaking of which, this front page is absolutely absurd to see as a Mets fan considering three of four will be wearing orange and blue next year.

I honestly don't know what else to say or do right now because I'm only awake because I had to piss in the middle of the night. To go from the Wilpons as your baseball owners to Steve Cohen is like going from listening to the radio your whole life to seeing Avatar in IMAX 3D. My stupid brain cannot handle it.

KFC and I are now on We Gotta Believe trying to talk ourselves through yet ANOTHER early Christmas gift at 3:30 in the goddamn morning.

NOW HIT UNCLE STEVIE'S FUCKING MUSIC!!!

AND BUY A GODDAMN SHIRT FOR THE MAN THAT IS DOING EVERYTHING HE CAN TO BRING A CHAMPIONSHIP TO QUEENS!!!

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