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Portnoy, Paddy the Baddy, Reigning MVP, & Defending Champs All In Action! || (The Dozen: Week 12 Preview & Rankings)

The Dozen Week 12 is here. For Christmas, you get four games in one week! To kick off, you get the reigning Champs taking on the reigning MVP as Uptown Balls and Team Minihane face-off. Paddy the Baddy returns to play against The Dozen’s holiday team, urMom. The Experts get to end 2022 with a tournament rematch against The Misfits. To end our week, we have Will Compton vs. Dave Portnoy for the first time. Our correspondent Scoops L'Aguirre has the breakdown…

NOTE: We are not sure which matches will air on THURSDAY or SATURDAY, but there will be a match on Thursday at 7|6c in the evening, and then another on Christmas Eve Day at 11|10c in the morning.




(3) Uptown Balls
- 3-1-0 Record
- 12.50 Points Per Match
- 2.00 Steals Per Match
- 75% Niche Success Rate
-- Tommy: 4.81 PPM
-- Smitty: 4.78 PPM
-- Glenny: 4.21 PPM

Balls Category Advantages: Celebrity Mashup, MLB, NFL

(8) Team Minihane
- 2-1-0 Record
- 13.33 Points Per Match
- 3.00 Steals Per Match
- 100% Niche Success Rate
-- Kirk: 7.39 PPM
-- Big Ev: 3.72 PPM
-- Quigs: 3.50 PPM (Season 2)

Minihane Category Advantages: Movies, Television, College Football

The last time these two teams played was the infamous Trysta Krick “Chuba Hubbard” game. Uptown Balls opened the game 7-0 and looked like they were going to set a record before Google came into play.

These are two wildly different teams. Team Minihane lives and dies by Kirk as he carries them to victory. Meanwhile, Uptown Balls have always been a team effort with three guys who all average over 4 ppg.

Team Minihane looked unstoppable to start the season, then they lost to Ziti, then Rico left, and now they are the lowest rank they have ever been with a good chance of losing again. Life comes at you fast.

9-urMOM vs. 10-THE BADDIES

Giphy Images.

(9) urMom
- 1-1-0 Record
- 9.00 Points Per Match
- 2.00 Steals Per Match
- 50% Niche Success Rate
-- KFC: 4.00 PPM
-- Jack McCarthy: 3.00 PPM
-- Rudy: 1.83 PPM

urMom Category Advantages: Movies, Television, College Football

(10) The Baddies
- 1-0-0 Record
- 14.00 Points Per Match
- 4.00 Steals Per Match
- 100% Niche Success Rate
-- Blaise: 5.50 PPM
-- TJ: 4.50 PPM
-- Paddy: 4.00 PPM

Baddies Category Advantages: NBA, Food, Soccer

Paddy the Baddy is back on The Dozen for the first time since his team’s massive upset win over Team Chicago earlier this season. With Paddy’s fan following, a win here would go a long way in getting their team firmly in the playoff picture.

Then you have urMom, who, despite having the #9 ranking, is currently the lowest-scoring team in the league by ppg. Former MVP candidate and ROY Rudy is ranked in the Bottom 10 in scoring per game too. They desperately need a big dominating win, or the computer metrics may knock them down into potentially having to be in a relegation game if they lose.

Blaise was a stand-out during the Baddies debut as he flexed NBA knowledge which is a weakness for most teams. The Baddies vs. UrMom will be the rare match-up where two teams know European soccer.



(7) The Experts
- 3-2-0 Record
- 13.00 Points Per Match
- 2.00 Steals Per Match
- 100% Niche Success Rate
-- Fran: 5.87 PPM
-- PFT: 5.08 PPM
-- Brandon: 4.83 PPM

Experts Category Advantages: Celebrity Mashup, NFL, College Football

(13) Misfits
- 0-2-0 Record 
- 11.50 Points Per Match
- 1.50 Steals Per Match
- 100% Niche Success Rate
-- Keegs: 4.67 PPM
-- RDT: 4.33 PPM
-- Dante: 3.67 PPM

Misfits Category Advantages: Music, MLB, Television

We have a rematch from the first round of last year’s tournament between The Experts and Misfits. The Misfits strangely gave The Experts a run for their money and had Brandon sweating for a couple of minutes even though Hank and ABP brought little to the table in terms of trivia knowledge. Switch them out for RDT and Dante, replay that same game, and maybe The Experts don’t go to the championship.

The Experts are coming off one of their best wins as a trio after dropping 16 points on Swamp Ass. Fran has been an absolute assassin this season. If Fran sweeps Celebrity Mashup against Keegs, you can call the game right there.

While 0-2-0, the Misfits have been competitive against two of the league’s best teams (Frankettes & Smockin). They haven’t been a bad team; however, they are again facing a top team, and a 0-3-0 start will likely put them in the relegation zone, meaning this is a must-win.


(4) Ziti
- 2-2-0 Record
- 13.50 Points Per Match
- 2.25 Steals Per Match
- 50% Niche Success Rate
-- Clem: 7.08 PPM
-- Eddie: 6.83 PPM
-- Dave: 4.33 PPM

Ziti Category Advantages: Snacks & Candy, Chain Restaurants, Television

(15) Booze Ponies
- 0-2-0 Record
- 10.50 Points Per Match
- 2.50 Steals Per Match
- 0% Niche Success Rate
-- Dana: 7.42 PPM
-- Donny: 2.92 PPM
-- Will: 2.42 PPM

Booze Ponies Category Advantages: NBA, College Basketball, NFL

Ziti has been playing fantastic trivia all of 2022. They added Team Minihane to their beaten team checklist; at this point, you cannot even call them upsets anymore. Dave is invested, Eddie and Clem are both Top 10 scorers, Ziti is a wagon.

The Booze Ponies have had an Uptown Balls level of chaos where they have blown two games they easily should have won. Yet, the chaos has made them an entertaining team whose fan vote is strong and will carry them to the playoffs if they can get a win or two. In order to win, someone other than Dana needs to answer a question or two correctly.



· The Top 5 remains the same; however, Smockin jumps from #9 to #6 after their 18-point showing against Gen XYZ. Gen XYZ drops from #8 to 11, and the win by Smockin also nudges both The Experts and Minihane down a rank.

· The Family remains in the Top 15 after a disastrous loss to the Yak in which so many points were left on the board. The Big Screamin’ Honkers only move up to #16 even with a win over Boys Bois Boyz, although at least they are no longer in the Bottom 8.

· Boys Bois Boyz are no longer in last but remain in the Bottom 4.


· KenJac is a no-doubt Player of the Week after tying the record for most points in a single game. He is leading the league in PPG and should not get left off any All-Star ballots this season.

· Rone earned Defensive Player of the Week after picking up three Steals in The Yak’s win over The Family.

· Joey gets Rookie of the Week after a big 7-point performance, knocking down his Niche, Television, Geography, and stealing the Big Screamin’ Honkers Doubled Movie question.

Enjoy the matches this week! Buy some merch…

Hell yeah!