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Tampax Needs To Chill The Fuck Out

Few things here:

1- why the hell does a tampon company need twitter? Honest to God question. Anybody got anything? Didn’t think so.

2- isn’t this a bit much? I mean who is this directed at exactly? Dudes right? Girls know the whole tampon game, inside and out, guys think about it only when it affects us. We’re oblivious, by choice, otherwise. So reminding us that, even though we might be in their direct messages, you are inside of them, might not be directed at us? Maybe it’s actually directed at our penises? Food for thought. 

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3- this was definitely a “bro” that tweeted this right? Probably goes to school at Providence or URI, one of those fun schools where you can land an internship that’s actually more like indentured servitude but that looks great on your resume for when you graduate with a 2.6 GPA and head to work at your dad’s company in the marketing department. You’re young and technologically savvy (literate), you managed major brands twitter accounts. (Tampax tampons). Nobody needs to know which brand per sé, Fortune 500 bro, big boy shit. 

Before all that though, you’ve been following along with all this Elon Musk persecution bullshit going down the past few weeks. You can see them shutting him down, (your boy’s boy, whose boys with someone close to Tim Cook told him the App Store was gonna get rid of Twitter), and twitter disappearing forever. You can’t just sit there and watch the clock wind down without heaving up one last fire tweet of a Hail Mary. So you drop the tweet you thought up 16 months ago when the “we are not the same” meme was burning shit up. You just had too much to lose then. Not anymore. Well played bro.

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