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The Broad Street Bombers Chase Lance McCullers Jr Out Of The Game After Taking Him Deep Not 1, Not 2, Not 3, Not 4, But 5(!!) Times

First up it was Bryce Harper in the bottom of the 1st with his first at-bat in Citizens Bank Park since sending the Phillies to the World Series in game 5 of the NLCS. His first swing? Bang. 2-run yabo to send The Bank into bedlam once again. 

The next inning starts with Alec Bohm. Right before he went up to the plate, Bryce clearly saw something from McCullers that he wanted to relay to Bohm. 

And the first swing for Bohm?

Bang. See ya the fucker later. Speaking of later…later in that same inning comes 24-year-old Brandon Marsh with 2 out. 

Bang. See ya the fuck later. The Phillies became the first team in World Series history to hit 3 homers in the first 2 innings. The Broad Street Bombers love to mash the shit out of the ball at Citizens Bank Park. And very few legends love to mash it harder than Kyle Schwarber does when you can get a 10" hoagie from Wawa for the low low price of just $6. 


A 2-run shot for Schwarber. What a beauty. And here's what the Phillies did a great job of--they cooled off the bats a little bit after the 2nd inning. They gave the Astros a little false sense of security. They had someone in the bullpen warming up to take McCullers Jr out of the game. The Phillies didn't want that. They knew they could fucking piss on this cat. So they wait a couple innings, let him stay in the game, and then take that poor sack of shit to the bank while Dusty Baker is stuck standing there with his dick in his hand. And since Dusty had know idea what was going on, he left him in for one more batter. 

That would end up being Rhys Hoskins. 

6 hits. 5 home runs. 7 runs scored. What a night for Lance McCullers Jr. Thanks for coming out, kid. Hope you enjoyed your stay in the City of Brotherly Love. 

Citizens Bank Park is ELECTRIC right now. 

By the way--gem of a night out of Ranger. Calmest human in Philly tonight.