Scoring 3 Points vs. Carolina Was Not the Worst Part of Tom Brady's Weekend. Reports of a 'Nasty" Divorce and Antonio Brown's Trolling Were Worse.

Scott Kinser. Shutterstock Images.

One of the best moments in 300 - which is one of the truly most ridiculous, and yet incredible, movies of the 21st century - is when King Leonidas seems to be bending the knee to the Persian godking Xerxes, but instead picks up his spear and hurls it right through the conqueror's earlobe. As blood sprays in to the air in Zack Snyder's signature slow motion and the narrator dramatically intones, "Even a god can bleed."

That line pops into my movie quote-cluttered brain more and more as I watch Tom Brady stumble through yet another anemic performance that would've been among his worst of practically any other season of his career, but is increasingly becoming his new normal. 

His team has lost two straight, making them 3-4. He hasn't been under .500 this deep into a season since the Super Bowl hangover year of 2002. He's only thrown eight touchdowns through seven games, putting him on pace for less than 20 TD passes, even in a 17-game schedule. They were just held to a field goal by the Panthers, who have already fired their coach, traded their best player, and are desperately trying to swim to the bottom of the standings, blowing bubbles as they empty their lungs and make their season's death as quick and painless as possible. That was just the sixth time in his career he's been held to three points or less. That is in 372 games. 

But all that futility on the field looks like an All Pro season compared to his private life right now:

Source - Things are getting “nasty” between Tom Brady and Gisele Bündchen amid their marriage split, sources say.

Page Six exclusively revealed Bündchen has hired the top divorce lawyer in Florida to take on Brady as the pair seem to be heading to the end zone.

Insiders say Bündchen hired Tom Sasser, the managing partner of the law firm of Sasser, Cestero & Roy.

The West Palm Beach divorce attorney has handled a stable of high-profile clients including  Tiger Woods in his divorce with Elin Nordegren.

Sasser also represented Jeff Gordon in his bitter 2003 divorce from wife Brooke which turned into a battle over the NASCAR driver’s net worth, but was ultimately settled.

A source said, “Things are very nasty between Tom and Gisele because of the lawyers. They are ready for a fight.”

That development is perhaps the worst news to come out of the GOAT's weekend. Though it had to survive a close electoral challenge from Brady and Gisele Frenemy-in-Chief Antonio Brown, who posted this little knee-slapper:

That would be the same Antonio Brown who once said of the man who rescued his career, won him a ring, threw him a Super Bowl touchdown pass AND let him into his family home, “Tom is actually my friend, one of my close friends. Some people have a different definition of ‘friend.’ Because when I say I’m your friend, that means I got your back. To me, though, that’s what a friend means." That was then. This is now. And in AB's world, a friend is a friend until you quit the team he plays for. Then you take the moments of his career and his personal life falling apart to suggest you're moving in on his woman. With friends like him … well, you finish the sentence. 

Even this long after Brady metaphorically took Patriots fans love and appreciation for him down to the Rescue Shelter and drove off to Tampa without looking back, we still have feelings for the man. Even those of us who felt most emotionally crippled by his departure and the great life he created for himself under the palm trees. But I can't imagine even the most resentful Pats fan wanted to see him go out like this. It's not quite reaching the level of how bad the end was for say, Brett Favre, Manny Ramirez, or the stories about Willie Mays in his Mets days. I mean, he's still Top 10 in the league in a lot of passing categories. But considering the terrible effects his decision to unretire has had and the way he carries himself, with the vacant stare and the resting look of regret on his face, it's actually worse than it was for those guys. A great athlete's legacy can endure a bad ending. But you can't fix a broken family. And when you're the butt of Antonio Brown's sophomoric jokes:

… there's no coming back from that. And nothing short of winning an eighth ring is worth any of this. 

I say again, if Brady decides to retire mid-season and spare his followers any more of this, I for one am willing to forget the whole 2022 thing ever happened.