Fuck Your Inflation! The Founder Of Arizona Iced Tea Says They Will Not Be Raising The Price Of Their 99 Cent Cans

CNBC- Although inflation remains near its highest point in over 40 years, one grocery-store staple has maintained its 99-cent price tag: AriZona Iced Tea. For 30 years, the tall 23-ounce cans, known for their eye-catching cherry blossom design, have sold in grocery stores and gas stations all over the U.S. for typically no more than 99 cents.

And despite rising costs, the billion-dollar beverage company has no current plans to raise prices on its 23-oz cans, chairman and founder Don Vultaggio tells CNBC Make It. “For as long as we can, we’re going to hold our price,” he says.

I bet Large feels prettyyyyyyyyy stupid crying about inflation and a possible recession on all the Barstool Finance channels now that Don Vultaggio drew his line in the sand and said Arizona will not budge off its 99 cent price point no matter what funny money bullshit is going on in this crazy world we live in. During these uncertain times, it's nice to know that Arizona tallboys and the Costco hot dog remain stuck in their same prices from the glorious 90s thanks to leaders that know how to lead.

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Now before anybody says that the price has already gone up, I would like you to realize that you have been hoodwinked, bamboozled, led astray, run amok, and flat out deceived by some internet hooligans looking to spread misinformation.

If we are being honest, hearing someone say they won't raise their prices "For as long as we can" lowkey scares the shit out of me since "As long as we can" could be a day, a month, a year, or forever. But there is just something about it being said by a guy with a name as awesome as Don Vultaggio who looks like this that puts my soul at ease.

Newsday LLC. Getty Images.

That's essentially the Arizona version of Heisenberg that built his empire on crazy affordable soft drinks that is pulling every trick in the book to keep up with the big boys of the beverage industry.

While other beverage companies spend a hefty amount of money on traditional advertising that will need to later be recouped through sales, Vultaggio relies on word-of-mouth. There’s nothing stronger than having customers recommend your product to their friends, he says. “That’s a lot better to me than a Super Bowl ad,” he says. To that point, the average 30-second Super Bowl ad costs about $6.5 million.

Another way AriZona aims to beat rising manufacturing costs is by increasing the number of products sold at its low price point. Think of it this way: A company could choose to sell one product for $4 or four products for $1. AriZona chooses the latter.

AriZona has also made subtle changes many customers might not initially notice. The company redesigned the lid of its cans in a way that cuts down on manufacturing costs, but doesn’t impact the overall quality of the product, for example.

I mean the guy even has A+ quotes like The Fictional Character Formerly Known As Walter White.

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Even if Arizona wanted to raise the price, I feel like the amount it would cost to reprint all the cans that have already 99 cents slapped on the side would probably put them in the red by billions. So buy a big ol' Arizona iced tea tonight for less than a buck, pop that lowkey strong top, then toast that everything is going to be just fine as long as the price of that can doesn't go over a buck.

P.S. I know the Costco hot dog has always been an incredible bargain and is basically free at $1.50 with a soda + refills in 2022. But throwing such a fine food at someone in unacceptable, even though people that don't put their carts back deserve being hit in the face with a baseball bat.