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I Am In Danger Of Being Locked In A Bowling Alley Until I Bowl A Perfect 300, But There's A Catch

We are approaching the end of the first quarter of the NFL regular season, and the Pardon My Take picks competition punishment has been officially set. While it wasn't exactly the smoothest road to get here (see above), this is what's at stake for the losers of this competition:

Last Place: Must bowl a perfect 300, with 5 pins taken off the target score with each hot dog eaten

Second Place: Must bowl a perfect 300, with 10 pins taken off the target score with each hot dog eaten

With 4 weeks down and 14 to go, here are what the standings look like at the moment:

1. Hank (8-8)

2. Big Cat (8-8)

3. PFT (7-9)

4. Max (7-9)

5. Billy (5-11)

6. Jake (3-13)

3-13?! Freaking horrendous. Feel free to start fading me if you'd like, but that'll probably be the time that I start to rack up some wins. It is a LONG season, so I'm not entirely worried just yet, but this start is really, really bad.

If I were to lose this competition, I'm not entirely sure that bowling in the beginning is even worth it. I think the strategy out of the gate would be to focus on chipping away at that target score while heading to the bowling alley with an empty stomach.

It would be tough, but it would be entertaining for you, the AWL's. That is what matters most.

Let's close this blog out with an obligatory Pete Weber moment: