Russell Wilson And His Team Attempt Humor With Suit Selection TikTok And It's Way Weirder Than You're Even Prepared For

Color me weirded out a tad. Russell Wilson is either hardcore code-switching, or the potential combination of Denver altitude and an edible has caused his robot vocal audio to change settings.

I wouldn't say I'm too bothered by this and it doesn't impact my life but straight-up odd is this man? You're telling me the Broncos are going to rally around him while they play for a seemingly in-over-his-Rocky-Mountain-skis head coach in Nathaniel Hackett? I feel like there's no way with behavior like this.

What does the real Russell Wilson sound like? Do we know? I don't think we do.

Who on his team thought this was a good idea by the way? None of them really know where to look while this video is rolling so you periodically get someone glaring straight into the camera lens and it's like WOAAAA easy there. The solemn and half-enthusiastic "yes/no" replies make this come off more as a corny creepypasta intro or something, as opposed to a humor-laden viral video.

And Ciara is just chilling there casually plugging Haagen-Dazs ice cream. At least it's the matcha version and probably non-dairy. Won't be as gassy later in the evening.

Other than the fact that none of us can, you know, SEE THE ACTUAL SUITS, my only source of disappointment from all this — because it's obvious Russ isn't going to change his lack of authenticity — is that Russ didn't end the video with, "BRONCOS COUNTRY, LET'S RIIIIDE!"

Twitter @MattFitz_gerald/TikTok