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There's Awkward Situations And Then There's John Lynch And Kyle Shanahan Crawling Back To Jimmy Garoppolo, To Rework His Deal, After Realizing Trey Lance Does In Fact Suck

I was sitting with some buddies at the bar this past Friday night, the night before our fantasy draft, watching the Patriots get embarrassed by the Raiders junior varsity team when an interesting news tidbit flashed across the ticker stating that the San Fransisco 49ers would owe Pretty Jimmy Garoppolo nearly $25 million dollars this season if he was still on their team by the end of this week. 

My buddy (lets call him Mike) remarked, "how awkward is it going to be in week 5 or 6 when Shanahan has to go back to Jimmy and throw Lynch under the bus saying it was all his fault and that he wants him back as his quarterback?"

I agreed on both the sentiments and the timeline.

Little did we know that we would be 7 weeks ahead of schedule and Mike Garafolo would drop this news today. 

Giphy Images.


No, Jimmy won't be starting week 1 (barring an unannounced injury to Lance), but it's apparent John Lynch was unable to get a deal done (shocker, I know) with the Giants (which seemed like a formality 3 weeks ago), the Browns, the Seahawks, or anybody else desperately in need of a competent QB. 

But all is not for naught. It looks like San Fransisco is sitting pretty if they can strike a restructure deal with Garoppolo.

Yes, whoever goes down over the course of the first month of the season will definitely come calling and kick the tires on Garoppolo, but my money is still on Kyle Shanahan, the man who is capable of fucking up a cup of coffee, crawling back on hands and knees to Garoppolo to stop the bleeding and get back under center.

Because Trey Lance sucks. Sorry to be blunt but facts are facts.

Shanhan said so much himself-

CBS Sports - "I would love to get Trey more practice and everything, more experience," Shanahan told reporters last week. "[B]ut we've run out of those games, and he's as ready to go as he can be. He needs to get in these real games now and start playing. There's going to be times he makes some mistakes, and he's got to learn from them and find a way to still win the game and overcome some of those things as he learns on the run."

That admission isn't what you want to hear. It means Lance isn't as far along as a passer as other top picks usually are, and you could see it in his most recent preseason game against the Texans.

Perhaps worst of all, Lance struggled with the Texans' pass rush getting after him. At the first sign of heat from the defense, Lance would move out of the pocket and struggle to keep his eyes downfield and identify open targets. It happened when he fired a lawn dart a few yards in front of Brandon Aiyuk when he should have just thrown it at Aiyuk; it happened when he didn't throw with anticipation on a deep dig to Deebo Samuel ; and it happened when he checked down to Jeff Wilson instead of seeing Aiyuk or George Kittle open for first downs.

And it's not like he's just underperformed in meaningless exhibition games. He's sucked in training camp against his own guys too.

It's not just the preseason games either -- beat reports from 49ers practices, including their joint scrimmage against the Vikings , offered daily up-and-down performances from Lance. That's not what you want to see from a second-year should-be phenom. He shouldn't be learning "on the run."

Not good news when you're talking about a team coming into the season with glaring offensive line problems. Especially the interior.

And you haters that think Jimmy G sucks as well can choke on one.

We're talking about a guy who was one complete pass away from having his entire legacy flipped -


If he connects with Emmanuel Sanders on this (who tracked this ball very oddly by the way), we're talking about one of the best 4th quarter comebacks in Super Bowl history (not featuring Tom Brady), and Jimmy is still coasting off this championship. Who knows how else the 49ers' history is changed in the two years since? But you get the point.

And last year, he helped take his injury-riddled team to within a final possession scoring drive away from returning to the Super Bowl. 

In games started by quarterbacks other than Garoppolo since Shanahan's arrival in 2017, the Niners are 8-28. They're 35-16 with Garoppolo at the controls.

That .673 winning percentage was the fifth best of all starting quarterbacks in the NFL with at least 10 starts in that time. In 52 games with the Niners (including playoffs), Garoppolo has thrown for 12,124 yards (eighth most in franchise history) while completing 67.1% of his attempts (eighth in the NFL in that span) with an average of 8.33 yards per attempt (first in the NFL in that time among qualified starters).

Instead of being respected for these stats, the guy has been left defending himself, a pariah or scapegoat of sorts, shouldering all the blame for losing to Patrick Mahomes and the Chiefs, on the biggest stage a few seasons ago. 

For context, you're also talking about a guy who still hears from The Hoodie on a regular basis (true love knows no distance). Bill isn't checking in on Jarrett Stidham, asking about his performance and offering advice.

My hope for Pretty Jimmy is that he takes even more of the York family's money, gets his tan on, on the sidelines for the next month holding a clipboard, then winds up somewhere he's appreciated and utilized. As bad of a dumpster fire Seattle is, I'd love to see him with a coach like Carroll. Two criminally handsome (Carroll for his age) nutjobs (in a good way) who'd become best friends.

Worst case for both parties, Don Yee reworks a decent payday for Jimmy, he chills all season, and the 49ers can get a compensatory pick after letting him walk in FA.

p.s. - if you buy that "leak" about Jimmy going ghost on his team and coaches in the offseason, you're dumber than the mouthpiece "reporter" who dropped it.