NEW: Bussin' With the Boys Dad Merch CollectionSHOP NOW

Advertisement

James Harden Throwing His Birthday Cake Directly Into The Ocean Might Just Be The Key To The Sixers Season

For those who don't know, James Harden turned 33 years old today. As someone who was first introduced to Harden while I was at ASU from 2005-2009 and his beard was only just getting started

Advertisement

it's crazy to think he's already 33. Then I remember that means I'm 35 and I want to put my head in an oven but this blog isn't about me. What isn't surprising is he turned himself into one of the greatest offensive weapons in the history of the NBA, you could tell that was coming during his time as a Sun Devil. There was nothing like seeing that shit in person, and when I tell you he was bigger than life on campus that doesn't even really do it justice. I'm sure he and I had very similar college experiences. 

I know he doesn't exactly have the best postseason reputation and now that he's a Sixer I guess I have to hate his guts, but I've always been and always will be a James Harden guy. I love that he can do nothing but party in the club and then lace em up and drop 60 right on your head. That should be celebrated. However, after watching that video at the top of this blog I have to admit, I cannot support these actions. Who throws away cake? Cake is delicious and I don't care what kind it is. I'm sure that birthday cake cost like $50,000 or something so to donate it to Nemo just feels wrong. I'm not sure you can trust a guy who is that willing to toss a delicious 4 tier cake into the ocean. When you're at a wedding and you're getting fucked up, what hits better than the cake? Nothing. That's the move of a psycho if I've ever seen one and I feel for those people who were on that yacht and probably were eyeing that thing all night just waiting for them to start cutting it and passing around a plate

I will say though, if I were a Sixers fan I would love this. It tells me that Harden is making sure he's in proper shape for the season to the point where he won't even indulge in some birthday cake. That's a level of dedication I don't think we've ever seen before which in theory should mean he's about to have a big bounce back season as long as that hamstring is healthy. For a team desperately trying to actually make it out of the second round for the first time since 2001, that's a pretty important development.

But as someone who loves any and all forms of cake, this makes my heart hurt a little bit. I bet that would have been so good and now I'm sitting here wondering what type of cake it was. Was it just a classic vanilla? Maybe with some raspberry or something? Was each tier a different flavor? The possibilities are endless and unfortunately we'll never know.