This Endicott College Gulls Football Hype Video Will Have You Ready To Run Through A Motherf*cking Jetty

Yesterday Endicott College posted the hype video for their 2022 football season and I believe I speak for all of us when I say they've got us ready to run through a jetty faster than our tipsy Uncle Dennis did on a Sea-Doo back at Nantasket Beach in '06. 

First off, looking at the trees in the background I'm assuming this was filmed last March, and the average water temp for Massachusetts Bay that month is 39° Fahrenheit. These guys don't give a shit. They're diving for catches, flexing, rollin' around, pointing the ball at us & splashing in the waves like it's Key Largo in August.  

Second, you know who else doesn't give a shit? The mascot people are poking fun at; Gulls. Are you the toughest hardo at the beach? A gull will drop a wet, gray shit right on your dome & never look back. They'll work as a team of talon-tearing terror until every single Dorito is ripped out of your bag & your entire crew of full-grown adults is scattered in fear. They're slamming more NorthEast clam than Wilt Chamberlain (specifically '64 - '68). They'll take over an abandoned Kmart parking lot in 10 seconds flat in the middle of a blizzard for no reason.

As such, this team appears to be a united front of sea-hardened Gulls and they're gonna snatch the *potato chips (*wins) from every team they play this season. Come at them, bro.

The Gulls start the season on Sat, Sept 3rd against St. Lawrence U in Canton, NY. I haven't seen a hype video for them and must assume that points to an impending L.