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Elon "Technoking" Musk Has Paper Hands

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Remember that time Elon was bullish on bitcoin's "long term potential?"

So that was a fucking lie.

According to Tesla's most recently quarterly report [trigger warning for people who say things like "it's so early" and "HODL"] it sold 75% of its Bitcoin. And get this, the carmaker didn't even covert it to doge. Elon's gone soft and converted to fiat Satoshi Nakamoto dies a little inside. The sale added $936M in cash to the company's coffers… which doesn't make sense given Bitcoin's conversion rate (1 BTC = 1 BTC)…. but alas, here we are.

During Tesla's conference call Elon said that he decided to pull the trigger and realize the loss to shore up the company's cash position with lockdowns looming in China. BUT, in typical Elon fashion, that isn't the only thing he said. Despite being one of the most prolific crypto bulls of all time (remember that disaster of an SNL appearance?) Elon said…

"Cryptocurrency is a side show to the side show." (MarketWatch)

The FUD is real.

Unsurprisingly, Bitcoin dropped after Elon threw shade.

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This is just the latest chapter in the saga that is Tesla's complicated relationship with Bitcoin. Early last year the company converted about $1.5B worth of greenbacks into bitcoin. Elon looked like the smartest man alive when the value of the holdings ballooned to nearly $2.5B. The company even took $100M in profit soon after buying. I think the kids call that having paper hands.

At one point in the year of our lord 2021 Tesla indicated that it would start accepting Bitcoin as payments, because it's "not a regular car company, it's a cool car company." That is until someone told Elon about the environmental impact of Bitcoin mining, and he backed off, given his company's mission statement and all.

Then crypto winter set in… isn't that right, Voyage, Celsius, 3AC, and that friend from high school that had to sell his Lambo and move back in with his parents?

Snap Necks and Cash Checks,


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