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Report: Deshaun Watson and the NFLPA Plan to Sue in Federal Court if He's Suspended. Good Luck With That.

AP. Shutterstock Images.

When we last got any sort of an update on the legal case involving Cleveland Brown's quarterback and America's most high profile serial creepy massage enthusiast Deshaun Watson, the matter was being Judge Judied by a retired federal justice. And the NFL was attempting to do what it does best, which is throw its considerable weight around to influence the the judge's decision. So they leaked out that they'd be willing to let the arbitrator's ruling stand if she suspended Watson for six to eight weeks, hoping that she would, so the automatic appeal process would kick in, send the matter upstairs to Roger Goodell's sacrificial altar desk, so that Ginger Satan could then increase the punishment to a full season, and look like a hero instead of the lying, thieving weasel we all know him to be.

I say again - and will continue to mention this each and every single time this matter comes up - I don't defend Deshaun Watson. At the very least, he has a weird fetish for making licensed therapeutic masseuses feel super uncomfortable. And at most, he's a sexual harrasser. Neither deserve defending. Whether you think that is worthy of costing him some or all of another season of his career is between you, your god, and your opinion of a guy who has embarrassed the league with his need to have his bathing suit area touched by unsuspecting women trying to earn an honest living. 

And so it is with some interest that this news came out today:

Take the NFL to court over the issue of whether Goodell has the power to suspend a player?

Giphy Images.

So a player, and the union, think the Commissioner might overstep his authority so they're ready to file suit? That he could possibly overstep his authority, and they want to redress their grievance in federal court? Where have we heard this before? Why does this sound vaguely familiar? Oh, right.

Giphy Images.

Remember that little matter of Brady v. the NFL? That case that got appealed, then re-appealed until it was one appeal away from the Supreme Court of the United States? So the same branch of the US government that decided Marbury v. Madison and Brown v. the Board of Education almost decided an issue about a couple of psi in some footballs on a wet January night? That is, until the Brady in that suit dropped it and accepted the ruling? 

That ruling being that Goodell has the absolute power to do whatever the fuck suits his shriveled, dark, vindictive, tiny little heart. It was said that the Players Association had signed off on Rule 46, the NFL's version of Order 66. And he had every right to abuse it.

Giphy Images.

And if I remember it right (believe me, I remember every second of it), the world celebrated with one, joyous voice. From fans, NFL players past and present, and media alike.This was justice being done. Goodell's unquestioned right to dispense punishment in any way he sees fit was affirmed by a federal court, and fully supported by the masses. He had struck a blow for "fairness" and "integrity." Which was shorthand for "Keeping the Patriots from going to any more Super Bowls. Of course the ruling preserved Brady's four game suspension, but the Super Bowl trips - and victories - kept coming. 

At the time, we in New England tried to warn the rest of you. You supported this unlimited authority in one man's hands, and it was only a matter of time before it bit you in the ass. When you give total power to Caesar because you like Caesar, it's only a matter of time before he's gone and now you've handed that power to Caligula. The major difference being that what Watson did is actual borderline criminal behavior. What Brady did was beat the bag out of the Colts in the AFCCG using footballs that were affected by basic laws of physics. 

I have no doubt Watson was one of the players celebrating Brady's punishment, because his team's owner at the time was. As were Browns fans still salty about the Belichick Era in Cleveland. And now Watson's about to waste his time, his effort, and millions of dollars in billable hours trying to fight the same losing battle. It's lunacy. But he's welcome to go on any fool's errand he wants. What he and Cleveland can't do is claim we didn't warn them.