Matt Carpenter Aka Matty Mustache is the Greatest Man To Ever Play Baseball

Elsa. Getty Images.

Barry Bonds, Babe Ruth, Lou Gehrig, Ted Williams. I just listed four of the all time greats in baseball history and none of them have anything on Matt Carpenter, aka Matty Mustache. 

In 31 games played with the Yankees, Carpenter has hit 13 homers, driven in 34, and posted a 1.397 OPS. He's putting up numbers that Jesus Christ himself could never have imagined. 

What Matty Mustache has done in these 31 games is legitimately insane. It's truly unbelievable what we're watching here and this weekend he decided to torment the Boston Red Sox.

From being out of the game completely to getting well-deserved curtain calls at Yankee Stadium. What is happening?

The story of Matty Mustache has taken over the sport. Just a hard working dude who continued to grind with hitting coach after hitting coach until he fixed his swing. Now that he's grown a mustache he's Barry Bonds. The magic continued today with a two run double that helped break the game open in the 4th.

Advertisement

10 RBIs into two games against Boston? Legendary stuff. At this point it's irresponsible for any struggling Yankee player to not rock a stache. 

Before it became painfully obvious that Carpenter had to be in the lineup every day, the lefty was sometimes going three to four games without getting action. To continue to put together quality at bats with that lack of rhythm is so fucking hard. He's just grateful to be back in the big leagues and playing for this team. It is impossible to root against this man.

Buy a goddamn t shirt of this hero.