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NYC Is So Back: The Average Rent Last Month Was A Record $5,000!!!

 

We're so back, baby!!! Remember during the height of COVID lockdowns where the hot narrative was "NYC is dead. It'll never be the same". Well I guess those people were right, because like the mighty Phoenix, NYC has risen from the ashes and is BACK!

 

CNBC - The average monthly rent for a Manhattan apartment surpassed $5,000 for the first time — and brokers say demand and prices are headed even higher into the fall.

The average apartment rent in June was $5,058, the highest on record, according to a report from Miller Samuel and Douglas Elliman. Average rental prices were up 29% over last year, while median rent was up by 25% to $4,050 a month.

The continued price pressure in Manhattan rentals could add to higher inflation in the months ahead, and put more pressure on the Federal Reserve to raise rates in an attempt to tame prices.

 

Fuck yeah!!! Where else can you spend $5k a month to live in a studio apartment with a shared communal bathroom and no washer or drier? Where else can you shimmy past the neighborhood homeless man taking a shit on the sidewalk before you walk up 5 flights of stairs to a family of mice declaring war on you in the kitchen/living room? New York City, the only place to be!

And the best news? Hold onto your hats, folks...

 

“There are no signs of a slowdown, at least not yet,” said Jonathan Miller, CEO of Miller Samuel.

 

In the wise words of Steve Austin, can I get a hell yeah?!?! No signs of a slowdown! Rent is just going to keep going up, up, up! Does every road have a pothole? Is every sidewalk covered in trash? Are you constantly in danger of a mysterious liquid dripping into your eye from the sky? Yes, yes, and absolutely fucking yes! But who cares?! It's New York City! The concrete jungle! Name another city where "happy hour" means $8 Miller Lites? Ya can't, bitch! 

All jokes (well, these haven't been jokes at all, but whatever) aside, I don't hate living in NYC. I went to a suburb a few weeks ago and it was miserable. I've grown to quite like the busy NYC streets. Trying different restaurants. Rats darting across your feet on the walk home. But then I open up Instagram and look at Uncle Chaps living in a god damn mansion with an Olympic sized swimming pool, paying a mortgage that is less than my rent and I wonder what in the blue fuck anyone lives here for. I could get used to suburb life- I like eating at Outback Steakhouse and going to Target. I'll get a minivan, I don't care! 

Would I recommend living in NYC? Actually, yes. Get a couple of roommates, live in up in your mid-twenties. Go to Gem, go to Factory, go to 310. But living here forever. No thank you. I want to put on Steven Cheah's lawn mowing playlist at some point before I die. That's the dream. Mow a damn lawn one more time in my life.