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Watch This/Read This When You're High - The Georgia Guidestones

(I wrote this blog under White Sox Dave's name back before I was given my own. Right around the time lockdowns began. Crazy to think how much time has flown by since then. Given Chief's blog this morning on The Guidestone's being blown up, felt this was pertinent to run back one more time.)

Not To Go All Tin-Foil Hat On Everyone, But Now Might Be an Appropriate Time To Discuss The Georgia Guidestones AKA America’s Stonehenge

Disclaimer – Dante here. This blog is in no way, shape, or form intended to come at the kings of the conspiracy blogs, Coley Mick or my good bud Chief. 

I know how a lot of stoolies, like myself, really enjoy the Sunday Conspiracy Blogs and secret societies.

Most people, that aren’t busy saving lives right now, are also bored out of their skulls and could use something to distract them or kill some time.

I’ve been creeped out by the Guidestones ever since I first heard about them a few years ago.

First off- What The Fuck are The Georgia Guidestones?

They are a set of blue granite monolith (slabs) erected on a hill in Elbert County, Georgia in 1980. On them are inscribed a set of 10 “guidelines”, in 8 different languages. 

Who cares? Right?

Where the hell is this going and why is this blogworthy? 

We’re getting there.

Turns out these 10 guidelines which are written in everything from Hebrew, to Swahili, are a little bizarre. 

Here’s what they are, in order.

  1. Maintain humanity under 500,000,000 in perpetual balance with nature.
  2. Guide reproduction wisely — improving fitness and diversity.
  3. Unite humanity with a living new language.
  4. Rule passion — faith — tradition — and all things with tempered reason.
  5. Protect people and nations with fair laws and just courts.
  6. Let all nations rule internally resolving external disputes in a world court.
  7. Avoid petty laws and useless officials.
  8. Balance personal rights with social duties.
  9. Prize truth — beauty — love — seeking harmony with the infinite.
  10. Be not a cancer on the earth — Leave room for nature — Leave room for nature.

At first glance I will agree, they seem pretty innocent, and positive. Value nature? Fuck yeah. Rule passion and faith with moderation and logic? Yes, please. Fair laws and courts for everyone? Awesome. No dumb laws and useless officials? Please God yes. 

You’d have to search far and wide (or visit Cambridge) to find somebody who would oppose any of those.

But then there’s guideline #1. Maintain humanity under 500 million in perpetual (aka forever) balance with nature.

On it’s face that kind of makes sense. In order for our planet’s ecosystems, and other species to all live in harmony, humans probably need to chill on expanding and destroying everything in sight. 

500 million seems like a pretty reasonable number until you ask Alexa (h/t Carl) how many humans are on the planet today.

Answer: 7.8 BILLION.

Don’t ask me to show my math but I think to get to 500 million would take killing off 12 out of every 13 people. 

So are the Guidestones promoting “culling the human race”? 

Not necessarily according to most experts. And by experts, I’m obviously referring to Alex Jones, the Ancient Aliens crew, and their boys. 

The consensus among that community is that the Guidestones aren’t necessarily instructions from the New World Order, Deep State, or whoever you want to call them. Rather, they are a guide for a post-apocalyptic human race to follow. 

That’s why they are carved out of big boy, high-end granite. Not that knock-off shit on your countertops in your over-priced West Loop luxury apartment. This is Grade A 100% pure Georgian Blue Granite, ladies, and gentlemen… Disco shit… Pure as the driven snow.

There are 5 of these babies and each of them stands 16 feet tall, 6 and a half feet thick, and weighs more than 20 tons each. (Fun fact, your average elephant weighs 4-5 tons) On top of them rests a 25,000-pound capstone. 

And the guidelines are transcribed in 10 different languages. English, Spanish, Hindi, Hebrew, Swahili, Arabic, Chinese, and Russian. The capstone is also etched with Egyptian Hieroglyphs, Sanskrit, ancient Greek, and Babylonian Cuneiform. 

OK, that’s kinda messed up but what’s the big deal?

Stay with me here.

Guideline #2- Guide reproduction wisely – improving fitness and diversity. 

Again, seems innocent and like common sense here no? 

This is pretty much the basis of eugenics. Know who was a big fan of eugenics? Hitler. 

Not Roger. Adolf. Also, communist China is big modern-day fans of breeding humans like show dogs.

(Eugenics fun fact) Did you know Yao Ming was a product of eugenics? It’s true. Those human rights-loving folks in the Chinese Government thought it’s about time they stop taking a backseat to the rest of the world athletically so they started their own version of Blind Love. But with the goal to create super athletes. Yao’s mom and dad, I’m sure great people as he is regarded as one of the genuinely nicest people to ever play in the NBA, were China’s tallest male and female. “Introduced” and “set up” by state officials. There’s even a book about it if you’re into that sort of thing.  

Anyway… Back to the Guidestones.

WHERE DID YOU SAY THESE THINGS WERE AGAIN? GEORGIA?

Yes, and I know what you’re thinking. “Man, you had me up until the point you reminded me these things rested on a hill in the middle of nowhere in one of the most ass-backward states in the Union.” 

EXHIBIT A -

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EXHIBIT B -

Why would the men behind the curtain, the puppet masters if you will, think Elberton, GA would be the best location to put their instructions to restart civilization? 

For starters, northeast Georgia is not just the granite capital of the United States. It’s the granite capital of the world. It’s also worth mentioning it’s in the heart of the Bible Belt. 

There’s also the whole numerology thing and the obsession and significance of the number seven. The monument is located off Highway 77, next to Double 7 Farm, 7 miles away from Elberton. 

Also, the Guidestones are 10 miles away from “Ah-Yeh-Li A-Lo-Hee”, aka the center of the world according to the Cherokee Nation. They used the site for tribal councils. 

Elbert County’s vast underground granite reserve might also provide stability in the case of an earthquake or other natural disaster.

The Guidestones' origin story is also very shady.

OK, IT’S TAKEN YOU 1,100 WORDS, NOW CAN YOU GET TO THE GOOD STUFF?

Yes. Hopefully, you’re still with us here because the people, or person, behind this, are perhaps the strangest part of this entire thing. 

You’ve got to keep in mind the Guidestones were constructed in 1980, right in the heart of the Cold War. Back then kids grew up living in fear Russia was going to bomb us into the mutual destruction stone age. Nuclear winter and Armageddon were talk of the day.

On a warm sunny afternoon, one day in June 1979 a suave, silver fox swaggered into the offices of Elberton Granite Finishing. He claimed his name was Robert C. Christian. (I like to picture him looking like Sam Elliot from Roadhouse)

Christian asked to meet with Elberton Granite’s President Jon Fendley. 

Fendley was a God-fearing, no-nonsense, blue-collar, hammer swinger. I like to picture him looking like the dad from The Wonder Years.

Christian came in very hot claiming he represented a small group of “loyal Americans” and that they were interested in constructing a large monument. By large, he meant larger than any stones to ever be quarried in the country. He went on to explain his group wanted them arranged in a way that would serve as an astrological compass, calendar, and clock. He also explained the guidelines that would need to be inscribed and the languages they’d need to be inscribed in. 

Christian mentioned his group had purchased a plot of land atop the highest point in the county where they’d like this constructed.

Fendley thought Christian was out of his mind so he quoted him an astronomical price in hopes to deter him. Christian didn’t blink at the price and asked how quickly they could get to work.

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Fendley then told Christian he wouldn’t be able to begin a project like this unless it was paid for upfront. Which Christian laughed at and said said “Obviously. Don’t insult me.” (paraphrased). He then asked Fendley to refer him to a banker he trusted. 

Fendley sent Christian to his good friend, president of Granite City Bank, Wyatt Martin. 

Martin was your typical “you need me, I don’t need you” cock-sucker banker. (I like to picture him as looking and acting like Dr. Larry from Meet The Parents)

Our boy R.C. Christian was not one to be intimidated though. Quite the opposite with Martin as he came in hot again telling him that his name was an alias. And that he and the group he represented were to remain anonymous to him and everybody else forever. Forever.

He explained that the group he represented was very well-off, and had been planning this project for 20 years. 

Martin tried to laugh Christian off but Christian was unfazed and dead serious. Martin then told Christian the only way he could authorize this project was if Christian told him his true identity and assured him he could pay for this loan.

Christian agreed under these terms: Martin had to serve as Christian’s legal intermediary, sign confidentiality agreements, destroy all records and documents upon completion of the monument, and pledge never to tell a soul about his true identity. 

He also made Martin agree to allow him to wire money from banks all over the country so that the money could not be traced.

Martin agreed.

Christian met Fendley again with detailed instructions and a miniature model of the monument. He thanked Fendley and informed him he would never see him in person again then hit the road. Later in the week called he called Fendley with a down payment of 10 grand. 

The undertaking began as Fendley’s crew questioned if their equipment was even capable of cutting, lifting, and chiseling stones the requested size. They trucked equipment in from all over the state to make it happen. 

As construction unfolded word around town spread and got vicious. Locals believed Martin and Fendley concocted this plan and story on their own to attract publicity, promote their businesses, and create tourism for the area. It got so heated that the local government staged a lie detector test for the two men at the Elberton Civic Center that was attended by all. The men passed the test easily. 

Christian would keep in touch with Martin via letters from all over the country. He never sent a letter or postcard from the same location twice. 

Word eventually spread of the actual guidelines being transcribed on the stones before they were complete. That led local Church leaders to begin denouncing the project as the work of an “occult group” on behalf of the devil. They told congregations the monument would attract devil worshippers from far and wide and that sacrifices would take place there. The third guideline after all mentioned the need for a universal language. All Bible scholars knew the Book Of Revelations warned of a “common tongue and one-world government” as the victory of the Antichrist. 

(Fun fact – there was actually a movement to make this happen in the 1960s. The language was/is “Esperanto”, the “international language.” The brainchild of Polish Dr. Zamenhof in 1887. It picked up steam over the years and gained traction to the point a movie called “Incubus” starring none other than William Shatner was produced entirely in Esperanto.)

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The man in charge of etching the inscriptions with a high-powered sandblaster later claimed that during his work he would come under possession, hear voices, and demonic music. Shit was getting weird.

The unveiling of the completed project took place on March 22, 1980, and church leaders' warnings quickly came true. Elberton was now on the map and became a tourist destination. Drawing people from all around the globe and even being listed as a travel destination by National Geographic. It also became the go-to for area witches. A witch gang war, or coven war, almost broke out between rival Atlanta covens both claiming the monument as their own pilgrimage site. It became THE place to be wed if you were an A-list warlock/witch couple. 

Although there are no confirmations of human sacrifices taking place at the Guidestones, there are several animal sacrifice confirmations. No Bueno. 

UFO experts are also quick to point out that a birds-eye view of the stones from above shows they are laid out in a perfect X (landing)-pattern. Visible from very high above, especially since they’re laid out on top of the highest point, on farmland, in the middle of nowhere. 

OK, YOU SUCCESSFULLY PIQUED MY INTEREST. SO HOW LONG DID THESE THINGS LAST BEFORE THE GOD-SQUAD DESTROYED THEM?

They’re still there. They’ve been defaced by graffiti several times and the anti-NWO community has urged their destruction, but you can still visit them. 

WHAT ABOUT R.C. CHRISTIAN? TO HIDE YOUR IDENTITY IN THE 80S IS ONE THING, BUT WE DEFINITELY KNOW WHO HE WAS AND THE GROUP HE REPRESENTED TODAY, RIGHT? 

You would think but no. Still anonymous. He and his banker/intermediary Martin became such good pen-pal buddies that they stayed in touch well past the completion of the project. Occasionally when in town Christian would drop in unannounced and take Martin to lunch. The last correspondence Martin received from Christian was allegedly around the time of 9/11. He assumes Christian passed away being in his mid-80s by then. 

One of the two widely believed theories as to Christian’s true identity is that he was/is Ted Turner.

This one has legs for a few reasons. 

Ted Turner-

  • media conglomerate creator 
  • billionaire
  • philanthropist
  • lover of nature
  • nemesis of Rupert Murdoch
  • once married to coo-koo Jane Fonda
  • real first name is Robert. Robert's first initial R. as in R. C. Christian. (who named Robert goes by Ted? That’s not allowed is it?)
  • big eugenics proponent
  • CNN based in nearby Atlanta
  • Smooth-talking, big swinging dick who gets shit done
  • (Allegedly) a high-ranking “Order of Malta” Freemason

But, Turner is still alive and Martin claims Christian died around September 11, 2001.

Speaking of Freemasons, how do they play into this?

Everybody’s heard of the Freemasons. Almost every town has or borders a town that has a Masonic “temple”. 

To the uninitiated, they seem no different from a VFW, Elks Lodge, or other social clubs for guys to get together, shoot the shit, play cards, drink some High Life’s, complain about women, and tell dick jokes. 

To the woke crowd this is all a front for the organization that’s been controlling the world since forever. 

I’ll leave the Freemason Deep Dive blogs to Coley and Chief because that would turn this 3,000-word blog into a 10,000-word one.

But in relation to the Guidestones, the Masons fingerprints are allegedly all over this thing. Fendley and Martin were both already allegedly elder Freemasons before even meeting Christian (Turner).  Meaning, they were marks, or in on it. Allegedly every man who participated in the quarrying and construction process of the monument was also a Freemason. One thing about Freemasons is they love engineering, architecture, monuments, and doing it all mysteriously. The Georgia Guidestones are definitely right in their wheelhouse.

According to most conspiracy theorists, Christian was a high-ranking member of a Luciferian secret society leading the charge for the New World Order. Notable New World Order opposition activist Mark Dice claims in his book “The Resistance Manifesto”, "The elite are planning to develop successful life-extension technology in the next few decades that will nearly stop the aging process, and they fear that with the current population of Earth so high, the masses will be using resources that the elite wants for themselves. The Guidestones are the New World Order's Ten Commandments. They're also a way for the elite to get a laugh at the expense of the uninformed masses, as their agenda stands as clear as day and the zombies don't even notice it."

(Not so fun fact – There is an actual expanding problem driven by unprecedented population change. It’s only in the last 100 years that we’ve begun adding people at a rate that’s causing this incredible disruption of the larger ecosystem. If you and I were having this discussion 100 years ago, there were 6 billion fewer people on this planet. It took us the better part of our total existence of the species, 300,000 years, before we hit the 1 billion mark. But in 100 years we’ve added 6 billion people and we’ll add another 4 to 5 billion before the end of this century. (Source: Dennis Caro)

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Others, and most in the non-conspiracy theory camp, tend to believe R.C. Christian and his cronies were “Rosicrucians”. 

WTF is a Rosicrucian you ask?

It’s a follower of the Rosy Cross. A secret society of mystics hailing from Germany in the medieval ages claiming to know the secrets of esoteric truths and laws of nature, the universe, and after-life which are purposely kept secret from the masses. Allegedly the group combines elements of Christianity, Judaism, and the occult.

R.C. Christian, they believe, was a pseudonym in honor of the founder of the Rosicrucians, Frater C.R.C. aka Christian Rosenkreuz. 

Allegedly, the Rosicrucians combine elements of Christianity, Judaism, and the occult. 

One of their more famous believers is none other than one of our founding fathers Thomas Paine. Author of Common Sense, and more importantly, The Age Of Reason. 

What is etched into the capstone? “Let these be guide stones to an age of reason”

The Rosicrucians have also supposedly been passing down secret knowledge of a solar cycle that climaxes every 13,000 years.

SPEAKING OF SOLAR CYCLES (NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH SOUL CYCLE) WHAT DO THEY HAVE TO DO WITH THE GUIDESTONES?

Well, the site location is set up to track the sun’s east to west migration year-round. 

There is a hole drilled in through the center support stone that allows you to view the north star when looking through from the south. This hole is probably the feature that was intended for detecting a feared cataclysmic event. The hole is similar to a device created by the Hopi Indian Tribe used to detect a similar calamity.

There is also a hole drilled through the capstone that allows sunlight to flow through it at noon each day and pinpoint the day of the year. 

On solstice days or during equinoxes you can stand on the west side of the monument and through the monument view the sunrise perfectly on the horizon. 

WHY DOESN’T SOMEBODY JUST GET MARTIN TO TALK? THROW SOME MONEY AT HIM, THREATEN HIM, BRIBE HIM, WHATEVER TO GET SOME ANSWERS.

In the words of the great Ted Dibiase, “everybody’s got a price”. 

Everybody it seems except for Wyatt Martin. 

You know in Casino when Joe Pesci puts that guys head in a vice until his eye-ball pops out? Wyatt Martin is like a fuckin steel vault. 

They’ve tried throwing money at this guy, book deals, babes. Nothing has got him to crack. He is keeping his word and taking this one to his grave. He never actually destroyed all the documents like he promised to. He has them in his garage. Including all his letters from Christian that he saved throughout the years. 

In 2013, at 82, Martin told Discover Magazine - “People ask, ‘Isn’t it hard being the only one left alive who knows who he really was? They could put a gun to my head and kill me, I will never reveal his real name. In my age and my profession you stuck by a promise of confidentiality.”  

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Brass fuckin balls. They don’t make them like Wyatt Martin anymore that’s for sure.

SO WHAT’S THE VERDICT ON THIS? SHOULD WE BE CONCERNED THERE’S SOMETHING SINISTER AT PLAY HERE?

Not so fast my friends. There’s more.

Resting near the Guidestones is a “legend code”. It references a time capsule buried beneath the tablet. The only problem? The date fields on the stone reserved for the dates the capsule was buried have never been inscribed. 

Even worse, treasure hunters, skeptics, and vandals have all tried countless times to dig the capsule up and have found nothing. 

(I really wish I could include pictures of all of this stuff but I am terrified of fucking up and posting a copy written picture landing Erika a lawsuit, and me on Kmarko’s blackball list. Google this stuff though.)

Was it ever even buried? Are the dates not inscribed because the people behind the Guidestones are still waiting for the end of times to bury it? The Alex Jones’ community believes this to be the case. That the worlds population will be drastically reduced, either purposely (“the great culling”) or naturally (a plague?), and the people in charge will then be placed. The dates will supposedly be that present days date and a date 100 years in the future when it is to be dug up.

There’s also this whole incident with a “cube”. 

In 2009 a small cube at the top of one of the slabs was anonymously removed. This caused public officials to install security cameras around the monument that were never actually turned on or set to record anything.

In 2014 there suddenly appeared a replacement cube. This cube perfectly fit into the missing space and bore inscriptions including numbers 8, 16, 20, 14, letters MM and JAM.  

Nobody knows how it got there.

Conspiracy theorists everywhere were convinced this was the Illuminati signaling the beginning of their “population reduction plan.”

Others believe the JAM part to be Latin initialization for Junno Anno Mundi  which means “In Judgement of the World.”

To sum it all up the Georgia Guidestones are some weird shit. And it cost a butt load of money to build and time to invest. This isn’t your everyday hoax or high school prank. 

Hopefully we get some answers when Wyatt Martin passes away. But that doesn’t look to be anytime soon because he’s now 89 years old and has survived two strokes. 

Everybody can draw their own conclusions on what the guidestones mean, if anything at all. 

But I’ll leave you with the factoid Yoko Ono was a huge fan, huuuuge fan, of the Georgia Guidestones. She wrote songs about them and still goes out of her way to mention them to this day. And for that reason I am out on the Georgia Guidestones.

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p.s. - As Chief covered, somebody (or something) blew them up this morning.

—- UPDATE ——

Now they’re completely gone