Barstool Finance: I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.

Large6/14/2022 1:55 AM

Stocks sunk deeper into bear market territory today as investors continue to liquidate positions in order to pay for gas in their motorcycles and prepare for rates to hike up quicker than this young motorist's skirt...

(Free GIFt)

The Dow was down 2.8% while the Nasdaq continues to underperform, dropping 4.7%… Meaning it has tumbled 10% in just the past two trading sessions… Meaning it is now more than 32% below its all-time high set in November 2021.

And over in the Make-Believe Finance World, Bitcoin "the world's most valuable cryptocurrency" has lost 15% in the last 24 hours, leaving it 65% below its all-time high of November 2021, and to its lowest level since December 2020. And its buddy, Ether, the second-most-valuable digital coin, plunged 17% and has now lost about 75% of its value since November.

So what's going on?

After yet another 'hot' inflation reading late last week, Fed Chairman Powell is looking like he'll push the economy into recession in order to regain control of prices.

So what's a guy to do?

BUY THE FUCKING (latest) DIP, YOU PUSSY.

I'm kidding, but Tyler and I are still looking to invest for The Family Office, so if you have a falling knife you'd like us to grab, click here and send in some suggestions.

We WANT to be exposed… But we NEED your help.