Surviving Barstool | Ep. 4 Premieres Monday (12/4) at 8PM ETWATCH EP. 1-3 NOW

Blindfolding 2 People Then Turning On A Ceiling Fan With A Water Bottle Attached To It Is The Sport Of The Future

I've been in the blogging game long enough to know that headline is a complete mindfuck. But I don't care. If you throw this on TV as a sport with announcers, a league logo, and a prize for the winner, I am going to watch it over anything else. Playoff hoops, playoff hockey, my beloved Amazin Mets that just so happen to be an absolute wagon are all looking up at this premium, top shelf content in my personal power rankings.

I don't know if it's because it's a beautiful marriage of physical + psychological torture like something out of Kevin McCallister's sick and twisted mind, because this dad was the such a great sport, or because ceiling fans are my favorite thing in the world. Seriously I fucking love the vibe they bring to a room along with the perfect breeze. But if the Ceiling Fan Water Bottle Challenge becomes the next big Tik Tok challenge, I may have to start using that lurid app despite every bone in my old man body feeling out of place whenever I accidentally press it on my phone.

Actually you know what? Fuck Tik Tok. I need The Yak to add a Blindfolded Water Bottle Challenge slot to The Wheel™ since that is an absolute match made in heaven. I'm actually shocked Jigsaw Cat hasn't thought of this since that sick bastard is elite at coming up with ideas to torture his coworkers. And if All Business Pete refuses to install a ceiling fan just for the express purpose to hit people in the face with water bottles, I can think of another show that'll be more than happy to steal this idea, likely with the fan being placed at the highest setting that is legally allowed in the United States.

For the record, I checked to see if Jackass has ever done this stunt, but the best I could find was Steve-O jumping into his actual ceiling fan, which is perfectly on brand for him.