Hysterical Woman Verges On A Panic Attack After Ticks Swarm Her Butthole And Possibly Vagina Like Vikings On The Shores of England

As someone who spent many a day out on the lake and in the woods as a child, I know the dangers of having ticks get on your private parts. Possibly worse than the ticks themselves is the fear that comes along with those ticks. Someone starts saying ticks or lice, and buddy,,, I am itchin like the dickens. I'm pouring over my body like John Mayer circa 2004. I'm combing through my pubes like a monkey cleaning its young. 

Now, you might think it's odd to ask someone else to check you for ticks but where I come from, that's the stuff of love. It's a love for a family member. It's a love for a lover. It's a love for mankind in general. Nevertheless, it's love. It's a love that they make songs about and people dance to at their weddings. It's tick love, baby. And it's purer than the cocaine that Pusha T pushes.