We, As A Society, Need To Come Together And Rid The World Of Sandwiches That Are Ridiculously Too Large For Any Normal Human To Eat
This burger came across my timeline earlier today. All things considered, I'm not violently opposed to the idea of adding shrimp to a burger if it's going to be a special on your menu. An every day item? Maybe a bit much. The only thing that really worries me here would be the addition of cheese to the shrimp. Something about that doesn't sit right with me, but that's besides the point. The fact of the matter is this burger, and countless other sandwiches around the world, have fallen victim to this trend in food where people make these sandwiches that are completely and utterly too large for anybody to properly consume as intended.
The beauty of the sandwich is the fact that you don't need utensils to eat one. You have all the ingredients neatly packed within some sort of bun, roll, slices of bread, what have you. You eat it with your hands--nothing more, nothing less--under the pretense that everything packed into that sandwich will remain in place throughout the duration of your meal. It's efficient, it's convenient, it's downright delicious.
But all of a sudden social media came along. And now you have all these clout chasing restaurants and cooks looking to fuck your brains out with some "food porn". They've made sandwiches bigger and bigger without ever once considering where the line is at. At one point does a sandwich become such a massive monstrosity that it no longer qualifies as a sandwich? I mean you take one bite into that sandwich and the whole thing immediately falls apart and is all over your shirt and the floor. Who the hell wants to eat like that? Who in their right mind wants a sandwich where you can maybe take half of a bite before the structural integrity goes to total shit? Not I. And I don't think any of you want to eat like that either. So the question then becomes "why"?
Why do these sandwiches continue to exist if none of us actually want it? Who in their right mind continues to make these atrocities? And what can we do to stop it from ever happening again? The time is now to fight back. We have the strength of numbers if we all just come together and unite against this common enemy. We must not waver in our undying hatred of these fucking ridiculous sandwiches that only a snake could eat. I promise you that if you follow me in this war against the aggressively large sandwich, we will come out victorious on the other side. Welcome to the revolution.
P.S. - This isn't the first time I've written a blog about the size of sandwiches getting out of control. But unless we all step up and take this battle seriously, it won't be the last. We must make sandwiches a normal size to be easily consumed again, or else we'll lose them for good.