Surviving Barstool | Ep. 3 Premieres Wednesday (11/29) at 8PM ETWATCH EP. 2 NOW

Trump Saying Hillary Clinton Had To Come To His Wedding Because She Had No Choice Was The Highlight Of The Debate

I know I just did a blog about Trump but I feel like this one deserved its own blog too. I was gonna combine the two, say “Trumps 2 Best Moments,” make the title really long maybe. There was just no good way to do it. They were both so awesome they deserve their own post.

Trump saying he gave Hillary so much money she had to come to his wedding was some boss shit. Like he straight up bought her. Purchased her for the night like a hooker. I give you money, you come party with me. Thats how prostitution works. Just an unbelievable display of power by Don. “Vote for me for President because I have so much money I can just buy important people and get shit done. Even my opponents.” Money talks, losers walk. Thats the Donald’s motto. Not even like he wanted Hillary at his wedding. He just wanted to flex muscles. She’d be the worst wedding guest ever. Worse than Pres. He probably put her in the broom closet like I did with Portnoy.

Also when they asked him what specific technique he would use to control immigration, he had the perfect response:

On the real Trump was entertainment gold but I could just never get down with a President who hates Mexicans and illegals. My number 1 thing as a voter right now would be to make sure there are plenty of illegals around to do all the work I hate for cheap for the rest of my life. Sorry Don, you aint the one.