Rob Manclown Should Be Embarrassed For Calling On The Federal Government To Solve MLB's Problems

Let me first start by saying I didn't know Manclown was a nickname. That's a phenomenal nickname. Idk if Marcus Stroman is the first to say it, but he definitely gets the credit in my history books. 

The source of this insult? A heavy Sports Illustrated article by one of the few baseball journalists with a functioning brain: Tom Verducci. His article makes it very clear that the MLB season is progressively more unlikely to start on time. And at the top of his list of reasons is MLB's recent public demand for federal intervention. 

Sports Illustrated - When Major League Baseball owners reached out to a federal mediator for help Thursday, it was a commentary on more than just two months of fruitless talks with the players to end the lockout. It also reflected how the two sides have agreed on virtually nothing for the past three years.

The more I think about this, the more it's obvious that asking for a federal mediator is absolute fucking bananaland. These owners are categorically anti-government when it comes to regulating business and pretty much any level of intervention. These are guys that swear by Darwinism and fucking people over and doing whatever it takes to advance themselves, generally. Sure there are some good owners in their own right. But collectively? In one theoretical room together negotiating against their own contracted labor force? FUCK OUTTA HERE if you think they're working in good faith. The mere fact these owners would ask for federal intervention is a major tell that they're gigantic fucking pussies. When it's convenient - sure let's get Joe Biden's secretary in the room to smooth things over. Wonder if there's any favors that need reciprocating? 

Don't answer that. Just take comfort in the timeline that's forced the owners to throw their hands up in defeat. Two months into their own lockout. Two days after committing to a proposal that never came. All this time to negotiate and instead we're jut going to run to Mommy & Daddy and cry about having to share. 

The union rejected MLB’s request for help from the Federal Mediation and Conciliation Service. It said in a statement, “Two months after implementing their lockout, and just two days after committing to Players that a counterproposal would be made, the owners refused to make a counter, and instead requested mediation. After consultation with our Executive Board, and taking into account a variety of factors, we have declined this request.

Which brings us back to Manfred. Sometimes it feels like he gets too much blame because he's employed by the owners. So the concept of the commissioner having unilateral authority simply isn't true. Baseball ownership is the strongest of any professional league and that's because it's been around the longest. Unfortunately it's evolved into such a slow-moving, antiquated group of salty cunts that sincerely believes there's room for compassion from the general public about their plight. 

Fuck that noise. 

The owners want to get rid of Manclown. They're sick of being in the negativity spotlight. They brought on Rob because he was supposed to be this negotiating superstar but the reality is we're trapped in the same pattern of disagreement. The bigger and more complex the revenue streams get for baseball, the more out of touch they are on how to split it up. And that ultimately comes back to the commissioner because he needs to be the liaison between the game's future and the owners that are responsible for ushering it in. 

Does anyone feel like that's actually happening?  

Players and fans are an emphatic No and it's my strong suspicion the owners are starting to form a similar line. Of course they'll end up blaming Manfred at the end of the day which is what he's there for. The owners are uniformly incapable of taking responsibility for their own mistakes so instead put it on the commissioner. Much easier when the old commissioner was legitimately one of the owners, but much harder when it's a whipping boy like Rob which actually makes me kinda sad to think about. 

The reality is that nobody can manage these owners. Nobody is going to get them to think about anyone other than their own narrow personal interests. Not with arbitration eligibility. Not with minimum salaries and certainly not with any moves that could impact the market for free agency. Revenue sharing, completely off the table. Nothing of any impact will go down, and we'll just wait around watching the days add up while the owners spew this kinda bullshit.

“Our goal is to have players on the field and fans in the ballparks for Spring Training and Opening Day,” said an MLB spokesperson in a statement. “With camps scheduled to open in less than two weeks, it is time to get immediate assistance from the Federal Mediation and Conciliation Service to help us work through our differences and break the deadlock. It is clear the most productive path forward would be the involvement of an impartial third party to help bridge gaps and facilitate an agreement.”

Fuck your Federal Mediation and Conciliation Service needs. Just a downright preposterous position for a group of billionaires to take. Never thought I'd see the day where they'd be collectively advocating for federal government intervention but here we are talking about it. Legitimately the only reason I can find is to create a path to get rid of Manfred. Otherwise how else can some rationalize this logic?

With that in mind I think there's maybe a 10% chance we get 162 games this season. They have a 14-days to work out a deal to still finish on schedule and honestly that just seems such a longshot. Unless of course the federal government can step in and save the day like they always do. That would honestly be some shit. 

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