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Ass From The Past - Diora Baird

I haven't done an AFTP in a while, but I've been pretty negative recently and I have a downright depressing blog hitting tomorrow, so I feel the need to post a little smut today.

Some of you might've read Diora's name in the title of this blog and said, "Who?"

While other, more seasoned, readers may have said, "Yes!"

And a few may have gotten excited thinking I was going to post inappropriate pics of Dora the Explorer... And believe me... There are PLENTY of them floating around.

Giphy Images.

Hopefully, the next 1,000 words will pull everyone into that second camp, alongside my seasoned brethren.

Let me start by saying that Diora Baird is only 38 years old… A mere pup compared to some of the other girls I have showcased in the past.  However, she started modeling and acting at the young age of 17, so there is plenty of footage swirling around that pre-dates the average Barstool reader.

So let's get started…

She was born in California, and her mom was also a former model…

In 2005 (a whopping 17 years ago) was the first time I saw her topless… And so did you.

She played Vivian in the movie Wedding Crashers, one of the girls thrown onto the bed in the "Shout!" dance montage with Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson alongside a handful of nameless broads.  

The only difference between Miss Baird and the rest of the scattered ass in that scene was she had a small speaking role with Wilson directly afterward where she realizes he's full of shit.

That small role coincided with her gig as a GUESS model AND her appearance on the cover of the August 2005 issue of Playboy magazine.  And if you didn't get to appreciate her attributes in either Wedding Crashers or Guess ads, you really got to take your time with her once that Playboy hit your mailbox.

Diora then went the "Scream Queen" route for a while after starring in 2006's Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning…

And then bounced around various TV and movie appearances… A few of them could be considered soft-core pornography if you were being judge-y…

But she also made the obligatory "perp walk" on Law & Order: SVU

Bobby Bank. Getty Images.

Had an uncredited spot in the sneaky-good 2010 movie Hot Tub Time Machine

And a quick appearance as a green alien in JJ Abrams' Star Trek, that ultimately wound up on the editor's floor…

She has a small connection to the show Two and a Half Men, where she played Wanda, one of Charlie's ex-girlfriends.  Baird appears in only one episode of Season 6 (mainly drunk wearing only a bra and panties)…


BUT a poster of her wearing short-shorts, an orange tank-top, and holding a black guitar remains hanging in the half-man, Jake Harper's, room. 

Moving on to her personal life… She was married to a fellow actor named Jonathan Togo from 2013 to 2016, and they have a daughter together.  But in 2017, after having her world fucking ROCKED finding out that I was happily married, Baird came out of the closet as a lesbian and began dating comedian Mav Viola. 

Giphy Images.

They were engaged for a bit, but have since split up.

Giphy Images.

I am not sure what side of the sexual fence Diora currently identifies with… And I don't care… Love is love.

I do find it interesting, however, that in 2017, she essentially told the world that after causing millions of erections she no longer wished to touch a single one of them… 

Bravo?

What else?

She currently has a smaller role on the insanely popular Cobra Kai series on Netflix… I believe she and Zabka have a kid on the show, but I haven't watched a minute of it yet…


And finally, one of the reasons I went with Diora, as opposed to an older bombshell, is that I wanted to shine a spotlight on someone who still has their fastball AND isn't afraid to show it.

As a 50-year-old male, I am fully aware that 38 is not over-the-hill by any stretch of the imagination… At least I hope it isn't.

But I also know that it's difficult to parade your body out there in an age of "forensic photography", where every overweight slob with a keyboard (like me) picks apart even the slightest flaw… Even though they themselves are built like fat piles of laundry.

So at 38-years-young, and still doing this for free…

While at the same time doing a LOT more behind a paywall on her Only Fans, I have to give credit where credit is due and say that Diora Baird is an Ass From The Past who isn't ready to hang them (her naked breasts) up anytime soon.

Take a report.

-Large