Lighten the Fuck Up! His Young Attractive Secretary was in on It...

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The regular wine taster at a high-end winery where he worked for 25 years, died suddenly and the owner was desperate to hire someone just as qualified to step in and fill the position.

A drunkard looking pretty ragged, wearing wrinkled, dirty clothes, needing a shave and a haircut wondered in off the street to apply for the vacant position. The owner of the winery tried to get rid of him immediately but the man insisted nobody knew wine better than he… 

The owner decided to play along and had his secretary get the man a glass of wine to taste, hoping to stump him and get rid of him quickly… 

The drunk swirled the glass, inhaled the aroma, then took a sip and said, “It's a Muscat, three-years-old, grown on a north slope, and matured in steel containers. Low grade, but acceptable.”

"That's… that's correct.", the owner said, astonished. "Okay, my secretary will get you another glass…" 

After swirling and inhaling the aroma of the second glass, the drunk took a sip… “This is a Cabernet, eight years old, grown on a south-western slope, oak barrels, matured at 8 degrees. Requires three more years for the finest results.” 

The owner was truly amazed. "Correct again!" He motioned to his secretary to get a third glass…

After swirling and inhaling the aroma of the third glass, the drunk took a sip and announced in a very dignified tone, "It's a Pinot Blanc Champagne, high grade and exclusive''.

The owner was completely blown away, but thinking this was some sort of hoax, he decided to put the man to the ultimate test. He winked at his young attractive secretary, secretly suggesting something. She left the room and came back with a glass full of urine… 

The drunk swirled it, inhaled the aroma, and without sipping it he looked directly at the owner and said, "It's a blonde, 26 years old, three months pregnant, and if you don't hire me I'll name the father…"

* Vindog has been repurposing jokes since 1968

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