Counterpoint: It's Actually A Great Day To Be Jake Gyllenhaal
Twitter is FILLED with tweets like that right now. Kelly Keegs wrote this blog earlier saying to "Keep Jake Gyllenhaal in your prayers." Because today, Taylor Swift dropped her 10 minute version of "All Too Well" that's apparently about her past relationship with Jake Gyllenhaal. Now, I'm not someone who knows much about Taylor Swift's personal life. I think she has some good songs, and that's about the extent of my opinion on her. I honestly just assume most of her songs are about some guy who broke her heart in like 10th grade. Didn't even know she dated Jake Gyllenhaal until last night. But when I found out this 10 minute song was about him, I assumed they must have dated for a long time and had a significant relationship.
They dated in 2010 for three months. THREE MONTHS. And 11 years later, she released a 10 minute song about him!!!! What an honor! Anyone who thinks Jake Gyllenhaal is down in the dumps today is so off base. I've always said that a girl writing a song about me would be the ultimate honor. I'd be so flattered. The original "All Too Well" came out in 2012, and that itself would've been a huge honor. But this is a whole other level. This is maybe the biggest artist in America right now releasing her own, 10 minute version of a song about you 11 years after you went on like 9 dates. Incredible. Jake Gyllenhaal should put this shit on repeat today and jam out in his mansion. Hell, I might even make it my fucking ringtone. If I'm with friends and I'm on aux? This is the first song getting played. "You guys know this one is actually about me right? How sick is that?"
So if Taylor Swift's plan was to make Jake Gyllenhaal miserable with this song, I think she failed. If anything, I'm jealous of Jake Gyllenhaal today and you should be too.
If you ever dated Taylor Swift, and you DON'T have a song written about you, that's gotta absolutely suck right? Didn't mean enough to her to get even like a 3 minute song written about you? Tough. Jake Gyllenhaal can't relate, that's for sure.