Guy Posts A "Guide To Get Laid" On Reddit And It's The Worst Thing You'll Ever Read

Reddit is a fascinating place. While there is a lot of interesting and cool stuff on there, and it can be a great place to kill time, there is also a lot of incredibly weird and cringey shit like this. But this is the stuff I'd prefer to read. If you ever want a good laugh, I highly suggest going to some popular subreddits and sorting by "controversial." That's where you'll get the really good shit. This one comes from the good folks over at r/seduction. It's a massive community of a bunch of dudes trying to help each other get laid. My #1 tip to them would be to stop posting on a Reddit page called "Seduction." But alas...

The full post can be found here. But let's break down this masterpiece part by part because it's that good. 

"Trust me this will not be easy but it will be a lot of fun"

Well first of all, this post is coming from user "ssuperiormen" so you know he's for real. Does that mean he thinks men are superior? Does that mean he's superior to other men? Unclear. But what is clear is that this dude must know his shit. 

He starts off with a fair warning. This will NOT be an easy task. Stop making excuses. And start getting to work. "Fucking work for it. No excuses!" Guy is like a hornier version of JJ Watt. The good news though? It will be A LOT of fun. 

"You basically want to get hungry. Hungry for pussy but not needy"

7 to 30 girls a day?????? I don't even know if that's possible. Especially if you're working from home, you may see precisely zero girls in a given day. Do you just have to work that into your daily routine? Finish work at 5. Work out. Eat some dinner. Then walk aimlessly around the streets until you can run into enough girls to get those numbers up. 

Just make sure you're not need needy though. 

"You are soy if you are too anxious to approach."

A very important clarification here. For a second, I was nervous. "Fuck. My name isn't Chad. It's Tommy. Do I still introduce myself as Chad?" Thank God he cleared that up. 

Advertisement

"Don't tell her that she's pretty."

Pretty obvious stuff here. When you start talking to a stranger, the last thing you want to do is be nice in any way, shape or form. "You talk about whatever you want." Crypto is usually a good place to start. Perhaps you can explain Bitcoin to them. After all this, DEMAND they give you their number. You have a friend's party to get to for God's sakes. 

"It can also be a picture of you doing something badass."

You do this to ALL AND EVERY WOMAN? We escalated from 7 to 30 to just all of the women very quickly. The profile picture tip is just basic knowledge. Shirtless pics. Maybe you holding a fish you caught. Or maybe shooting a gun at the range. Tossing the pigskin. Just anything badass.

And of course, the key to winning over any girl's heart is poor grammar and run on sentences. Don't even think of putting a pussy ass period between your sentences. 

"If what she texted you last was a question, ignore it. Logistics."

Makes sense. She might be asking you some dumb girl shit like, "Where are you from?" or "What was that last text? It's impossible to understand." Ignore that shit and tell her to get her ass to a badass place. Maybe the same badass place you got your profile picture? 

Advertisement

"Keep in mind: Women hate logic."

Sure, this guy might have posted a novel to a subreddit about how to get laid, but you have to do some research on your own. What is this guy, fucking Santa? 

And we all know women hate logic. They much prefer shopping and Barbie dolls. No room for logic in their small little brains (per science). If I had to disagree with this guy about one thing though, I'd say that getting stood up on a date is very much your problem. 

"You are the king and she's a peasant."

Basic stuff. Neg her a little but don't be TOO over the top about it. You have to remain some form of humility. Oh and by the way, you're a king and she's a peasant. Other than that, nothing extreme though. 

"Consent is still important keep that in mind!"

A respectful king! Just a subtle, gentle reminder to not rape anyone. 

Advertisement

"Let's fuck" even worked for me after successful escalation."

We went from "consent is key" to "escalate, escalate, escalate!" real fast. Don't know any dirty talk? No worries. A simple "Let's fuck" is usually effective. 

This guy being so adamant about using a condom did take me by surprise. Thought for sure he'd be a raw dogger. But you can't be having a stupid little baby when you're busy being hungry for pussy. 

And that's about it. He covered everything. Just to give a recap:

-Approach 30 different girls every single day. Demand their number and text them run on sentences with no capital letters. Tell them to meet at a place at a given time and don't confirm at all that they're showing up. Be an asshole on the date. Go back to her place, make sure you have consent, and then say "Let's fuck." Wear a rubber and leave. 

Foolproof.