New York Knick Hall-of-Famer Iman Shumpert Netted A Perfect Score On Dancing With The Stars While Leaving Panties In Puddles

I gotta be honest. I don’t think this should have been a perfect score. A good performance? Sure. Barely good. This had the precision of a late NFL season walk through. It was going through the motion. Where were the crisp movements? Why didn’t Iman point his toes when he kicked his legs out. Where were the exaggerated facial expressions.

“Chaps! Chaps! What do you look for when judging dance competitions as you do so often?!”

Well, the set of criteria evaluated for each event varies, as does the scoring model for that Criteria. Each criteria is generally judged by multiple judges for any competitor which is only fair. Those criterion can include: Rhythm, Enjoyment, Posture, Styling, Grace and Ability.

Iman has the ability and style. I just need more in terms of posture, enjoyment, and especially grace. This was graceless. I normally don’t like to say stuff like this but with everyone taking Iman deeply into their throats about this performance, it’s just a remind to not gobble all the gook that gets thrown out. Think for yourself, dancing sheep. That’s all I’m saying.

Demand more; you just might get it.

Ps: just speaking hall of famer into existence