St. Patrick's Day Collection Now Available at the Barstool StoreSHOP NOW

Candace Parker Absolutely Dunked On Giannis With A Championship Trip To Portillos

Giannis and Cik Fil A don't have shit on Candace Parker and this Portillos run. Jumbo chili cheese dog and fries? On the day chili season is formally announced no less? A 16-piece of something? Without reviewing the full game tape, there's lots to be proud of even if there's no italian beef in the order. I'm not here to be a stickler. I'm here to support our champions and their blatant love for a Chicago staple like Portillos. Nobody is side eyeing the order. 

That said I want to get people more on board with the beef and cheddar croissant. That's a sandwich Jeff D Lowe has objectively scored a 10.0. He said it was the best thing he's ever bit into. I along with many other people agree that it is a tier-1 sandwich, but it doesn't get the recognition. I think that has more to do with the croissant than anything. People are always complaining about how they're too flaky or buttery or not stuffed with enough chocolate if you're into that kinda stuff. But you never hear anyone positively talking about a croissant without them being totally surprised. It really pisses me off. 

Again, not trying to dethrone italian beef or shade any part of the Portillos menu. I only find it appropriate to mention in the wake of this celebration that the BCC plays so fucking well. And I say that so confidently knowing about 75% of you have never even tried it. 

Don't wait until the next WNBA championship to find out for yourself. I encourage feedback as you embark on this journey. 

And while we're here, I think it's also important to offer up your championship order. For me it's a no brainer. 

I'm going late night window at JP Graziano. I'm going with the muffuletta AND a Mr. G. I'm getting a bottle of the lemonade soda and two of the cherry bang. I'm going double kettle cooked sea salt n vinegar. I'm going lemon sorbet to finish with double cannoli. That's my own personal order but in hindsight I might just do a party tray of subs. Everybody's happy when you get to split a sub. That would be a nice touch. 

That's just me though. I'm biased in my obsession for JP Graziano's Italian meats and cheeses. Other popular championship food destinations: 

- Rock n Roll McDonalds regardless of what the haters say

- Gale Street Inn for French Onion and a full rack of the good stuff

- Mr. Greek gyros (or an equivalent like Rosies in Oak Lawn) 

- Pizza party at my place with a bunch of home run inn One Bites

- Anywhere that does a good meatball 

- Johnnie's beef if it's nice outside. Al's original if weather sucks. 

- Velvet Taco which is actually delicious and perfect when you're hammered

- Tony's authentic burrito mex 

- Couple steaks at Ditkas 

Not a shabby list. What spot did I miss?