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I Have One Thought About The Finale Of Ted Lasso Season 2


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No, not you Nate Dawg. Fuck this cunt (I can say that because the word isn't as bad since we are talking about a soccer show based in England).

Apologies for the delayed reaction, but catching up on a TV show as an Old with kids that works in sports as football, school, and fall activities all kickoff. 

Anyway, back to that bloke Nate. I've seen a bunch of people say that this is the most shocking heel turn since Hollywood Hogan dropped the red and yellow for the black and white and comically awful beard.

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I would venture to say that Nate's is even closer to Anakin Skywalker turning to the dark side with Ted Lasso being his Padme + his Obi-Wan and the Believe sign being the younglings he slaughtered.

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Actually that's not true, destroying the Believe sign was much worse than any death in movie history and joining forces with that cunt Rupert is worse than bending the knee to ol' wrinkly ass Palpatine.

I've already seen the think pieces about how a million micro aggressions rightfully caused Nate to go rogue, which admittedly caused my eyes to roll through the back of my head like every article that uses the word micro aggressions does. Nate's dad is an asshole, he was mistreated as the equipment manager, and Ted may not have been there for him during his time of need because Ted was dealing with his own shit. I get all of that along with a bunch of other things caused Nate to become what he became, which is a snake, a rat, and a source for Trent Crimm formerly of The Independent. But that doesn't stop Nate from now being the Joffrey of AFC Richmond in my eyes, which is perfect since you know this dickhead would've loved to be called the Wonder Kid.

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Much like Joffrey, the actor that played Nate crushed his role by making his character so hatable and did an awesome job breaking down all the subtle ways Nate's turn to the dark side.

No BIG LOVE, Nate! BIG HATE!!! I thought I was going to love Nate as a goofy side character, at least until he started mistreating the new equipment lad for no good reason, which put him at the top of my Sus List. Then I realized how great of a twist Nate's heel turn would be, which is further proof the Darth Jar Jar angle was the correct path for George Lucas to take in the Star Wars prequels.  Much like with that Gungan asshole, the story was told in the eyes.

Okay, that's enough Star Wars talk. 

This show is good and so much better than I thought it would be when people recommended it to me. I am still shook at how this all played out, which is a credit to just how good it is. It makes you feel happy, sad, angry, and hopeful in ways you never imagined. After episode 1, I was absolutely positive based on every sports movie or TV show I've ever seen, I was going to hate Rebecca, loathe Higgins, despise love Nate, grow tired of Keeley, and be ready ride to the depths of hell for Ted Lasso. And none of that even came close to coming to fruition other than the last one, since I'd both kill and die for this man.

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I'd say all of this leads up to an inevitable showdown between Ted's Richmond team taking on Nate The Great's Taint's West Ham United which ends in Nate realizing the error of his ways after Ted beats him then recites a couple of one liners littered with nostalgic references. But if I have learned anything from this show, it's to expect the unexpected. Maybe Ted will finally snap, chop Nate's head off with a machete, Roy can kick his head into the nearest goal, and Beard can fuck his headless corpse. That would be an acceptable ending as well.

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Okay, that got pretty dark and really weird. Here are a couple other thoughts from the last few episodes for a blog about one thought about one episode:

- I became a Chelsea fan last summer and know they have a rivalries with a bunch of other teams. But I loathe West Ham more than any other team in the EPL and maybe all of sports. Fuck the :Googles West Ham's nickname: Hammers right up their stupid arses.

- I saw someone compare Rebecca's mentorship of Keeley causing her to bloom in contrast to Ted's mentorship to Nate causing his soul to turn as black as his suits as his hair turned white. I didn't think I needed to join the Ted Lasso subreddit to get deep about a show about a peppy soccer coach. But here we are.

- Never in a million years did I think I would actually like that wanker Jamie Tartt ever again. But here I am, rooting for him to find his next Keeley (I swear to God I will break every bone in his body that Roy Kent doesn't break if he goes after the real Keeley again) and beat the everliving piss out of his dad. But he has to fix that eyebrow first. I cannot like a person with that type of eyebrow.

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- Speaking of which, I am extremely nervous about Roy Kent going here, there, and Marfuckingbella for six weeks is going to somehow ruin his relationship with Keeley. Yes, these are the thoughts of a grown ass man who's been married for 11 years and has two kids. This show truly has permeated my brain. I don't like that trip being referenced in the jump ahead. It is officially Chekhov's trip in my mind.

- Sam may be the most delightful character in a show jam packed with them and the actor has a Top 5 smile of anyone on Earth. The only thing I dislike about him is that he reminds me of my sweet Frank, who is now playing with that 7'3 Latvian snake in Dallas.

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- I liked the Beard episode that a bunch of people seemed to be unhappy with. I love how this show gives us a glimpse into all the pieces of Richmond AFC, with this putting a spotlight on Beard and the fans, who I adore. I also don't trust Jane Payne one iota. Number 2 on the Sus List behind Fuckface Nate.

- After rewatching everything that happened in Season 2, I cannot waiiiiiiiit until Season 3 comes out and completely ruining my experience by listening to theories of what may happen on r/TedLasso.