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Now Alex Guerrero, a/k/a the Yoko Ono of the Patriots Dynasty, is Ripping Belichick

Charles Krupa. Shutterstock Images.

Ever since the NFL schedule came out, I've been dreading Week 4. Brady vs. Belichick. The battle of the gods. GOATerdammurung. Every time I'm asked if I'm going, I have to admit I'll barely be able to handle it from a sofa, much less being at the core meltdown of my emotional Chernobyl. I've got a buddy trying to get $6,500 for his four seats, and I hope he collects every nickel. But I wouldn't go to Gillette if I had Mr. Kraft's helicopter dropping me off at the 50 yard line and a luxury box filled with top shelf liquor and escorts waiting for me. 

Well the game is still a week and a half away and already it's getting to me. First it was Tom Brady Sr. taking shots at Belichick:

Now it's Brady's massage therapist/pliability guru/business partner/life coach/Yoko Ono taking this opportunity to flex on the man whose band he broke up. 

Source - During a 20-minute conversation with Alex Guerrero, Brady’s personal trainer, business partner and one of his closest friends, the Herald attempted to get some answers about how the Buccaneers quarterback feels about his former coach and team. … 

 For starters, Guerrero chalked up Tom Sr.’s remarks to those of a protective, loving father. He wasn’t necessarily speaking for his son. …

Guerrero did, however, confirm Brady no longer felt wanted in New England, and the front office wasn’t giving him enough reason to stay. …

“The interesting thing I think there — and this is just me, an outsider looking in — it was like Bill never really … I think his emotions or feelings never evolved with age,” Guerrero said. “I think in time, with Tom, as Tom got into his late 30s or early 40s, I think Bill was still trying to treat him like that 20-year-old kid that he drafted. And all the players, I think, realized Tom was different.

“He’s older, so he should be treated differently. And all the players, none of them would have cared that he was treated differently. I think that was such a Bill thing. He never evolved. So you can’t treat someone who’s in his 40s like they’re 20. It doesn’t work.” …

“It’s interesting, if you look at how Bill looks at some of these other players, it looks to me like he’s been able to modify or change a little bit,” said Guerrero. “Maybe he’s forced to. If you’re going to be a coach, a coach should be the one to modify or make changes.” …

“This place, we have so much fun here. We have a great time,” said Guerrero. “They’re great here. Ownership is great. The coaching is great, the management is great. …

“We [at TB12 Fitness] have great support over here. The ownership is super supportive, the coaching staff is super supportive. The players are supportive. So it’s been great.”

Ugh. Where do I even begin to deal with this? Look, I get it. Guerrero is living his best life right now. He made best friends with the greatest winner in the history of pro football. And cashed in that meal ticket all the way to a tropical paradise where ownership gives him free reign. Full access to all the facilities. Total freedom to give medical advice and treatment to anyone on the roster who'll listen. He's got it made. Sitting on top of a personal wellness empire and free to sell all the shake bottles, supplements and resistance bands the public will buy. 

But it's not enough. He's got to drop his teabag on the coach who made his whole business venture possible. And by extension, the owner who gave them a storefront in his retail and entertainment complex and allowed him to build up his brand. Worse, he's got to remind me how he was a part of it all unraveling. Now I'm standing here thinking about how great everything was before The Pliability War started. I'm like Sherriff Woody stranded at the Dino Gas screaming at Buzz, "Well, if YOU hadn't shown up with your stupid little cardboard spaceship and taken away everything that was important to me…!"

Imagine living your whole life since birth for the sole purpose of being a football coach. You work your way up through the ranks. In 1975 you find yourself making coffee runs for Ted Marchibroda in a job so low paying that he used to slip you money just so you could eat. Eventually you find yourself coaching special teams in Detroit. Then work your way up to the defensive coordinator's job with the Giants. You win two Super Bowls there and get hired to run things in Cleveland. That goes well until the carpetbaggin' bastard who owns the team pulls the rug out from under you. Your old boss Bill Parcells throws you a lifeline and you help DC him to a Super Bowl in New England and then a conference title game for the Jets. You get another chance at running a franchise from Mr. Kraft and you build an empire the likes of which the NFL has never seen. Along the way you've been the architect of game plans that stopped The K-Gun, The West Coast, The Greatest Show on Turf, the Colts of the early 2000s, the 2016 Falcons and 2018 Rams. You're third all time in wins by a coach, and counting. You by far have the most postseason wins by a coach, and counting. 

And after all that, a masseuse who's been sued for false claims and run afoul of the FTC on more than one occasion is dragging you for not understanding how to manage people. If I'm Belichick, I'm seething at the sheer insolence. Thinking about how, if I had drafted, developed, trusted and supported Brady all those years, this guy would be working for tips at a Massage Envy in a mall or a Peleton instructor someplace. 

But then, what can you do? Since the divorce, Brady has soared to even greater heights, while Belichick went 7-9. So he's got the upper hand and people around him are taking full advantage. When you're on top, you get to say what you want. And the only way Belichick can get the hand back is to win a Super Bowl with Mac Jones and toss the Lombardi Trophy to the Duckboat behind him on Boylston Street. History is written by the victors. Until that day happens, this is how it's going to be. From Brady Sr. Guerrero. Possibly Gisele. Friends. Family. Neighbors. All of whom will probably also say they're not speaking for Tom. But you know he feels the same way. And it blows.

Just to wrap this up, maybe the relationship between the two should've evolved. I know I spoke to Belichick personally once about how he has adapted his coaching style over the years to fit modern players. And perhaps he had a blind spot when it came to Brady because he had always been a guy who responded to being rode hard and put up wet. And when Brady changed, didn't change with him. Only they know for sure. All I know is that listening to Brady's camp flex like this for the next few weeks is going to be the death of me.