NFL Week 1 Round Up - NFC

Again, apologies for these dropping 5 hours late today. We'll get on track next week. That is a promise.

Here's what happened yesterday in the National Football Conference.

Robert Alexander. Getty Images.

San Fransisco 49ers -8.5 at Detroit Lions
O/U 45.5

 The return of Pretty Jimmy G. The return of half of San Fran's starters from last year's IRL. The debut of Jared Goff in the motor city. The debut of the Dan Campbell regime. This game had a lot going on.

Including marking the reunion of two teams who last time met in Detroit had this all-time moment occur- 

Which in turn led to one of the greatest storylines in Barstool history -

Yes, OG stoolies remember well, the time a young Big Cat stalked out Big Bad Robbie Lang and pretty much adopted him as a second dad. 

Back to the game-

Jimmy G looked good, despite being on the bench for San Fran's first score watching Trey Lance.

This will come as a shock, but Goff was up and down. 

Jared Goff still doing Jared Goff things. And by Jared Goff things I mean telegraph passes over the middle into triple coverage

This one was out of hand at one point but San Fran fell asleep and let Detroit back into it. Nearly coming back from 28 down.

FINAL - 

49ers 41
Lions 31

LA Chargers at Washington Football Team -1
O/U 44.5

This one started exactly how you want your season to. 

Raining shit.

Honest question- how is Dan Snyder allowed to continue to own a professional sports franchise? It's amazing he can tie his own shoes.

It didn't get any better for Washington fans sadly as that was followed by a game-ending (possibly season-ending) injury to their starting QB. Fitzpatrick exited the game real early. Poor Washington.

And it was officially Taylor Heinicke time.

But Justin Herbert was just too much. Kid is a fucking stud.

Washington stayed in it, thanks to their grit and some very lopsided calls, but literally nothing could go their way.

FINAL-

Chargers 20
WFT 16

Green Bay Packers At New Orleans Saints +3.5
O/U 49.5

As we all predicted, this one was the Jameis Winston show.

Honest question- Is Aaron Rodgers a mole?

Guy can lay the lumber though I'll give him that.

This one was ugly for the Packers and their fans.

And Jameis is a real beauty.

FINAL - 

Saints 38
Packers 3

Atlanta Falcons at Philadelphia Eagles +3
O/U 48.5

I know it’s going to kill Eagles fans to hear this, but Jalen Hurts might be pretty good.

Davonta Smith welcome to the party.

The Eagles rolled in this one.

FINAL -

Eagles 32
Falcons 6

NY Jets at Carolina Panthers -3.5
O/U 45.5

First off, wtf was this? Did the guy who designed the FOX Hockey robots get a new gig?

This game ended up going down as the Sam Darnold revenge game. Guy looked great in a somewhat capable system.

But so did Zach Wilson…

The Jets just couldn't hold onto the ball. Or protect the poor kid.

FINAL - 

Panthers 19
Jets 14

Chicago Bears at LA Rams -7.5
O/U 46.5

Welcome to So-Fi stadium. The new home of the fair-weathered Los Angeles sports fan.

Nagy dick teased every Bears fan by sprinkling Justin Field in, but never turning the reigns over officially.

Stafford looks dangerous on this team. Lots of weapons

But the Bears defense did themselves no favors. They were exposed and exposed badly. Vic Fangio you are dearly missed.

Denver Broncos at NY Giants +3
O/U 41.5

This one had all the markings of a stinker but actually ended up being a very entertaining game.

Even from the sidelines.

Melvin Gordon The Third went OFF.

Teddy Bridgewater was erratic 

Sterling Shepard can still ball.

The Bronco's D might be legit. Or the Giants just can't protect the football. Or both.

What happened to the Giants O line? Did it somehow get even worse?

What happened to the Giants faithful?

Rough opener.

FINAL -

Broncos 27
Giants 13

ICYMI - AFC