Nothing to See Here. Just a Massive 'Jellyfish-Shaped Object' Racing Across the Sky
Source - A MYSTERIOUS “jellyfish-shaped object” which suddenly appeared in the Earth’s atmosphere has stunned local Russians.
Residents in the Amur Oblast region spotted the glowing object flying overhead last month, and released a video of it online.
In the footage, published on YouTube by Viral Hog, the comet-like object can be seen hurtling towards the Earth as stunned onlookers revel in its beauty.
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One user speculated that it could be a rocket, writing: “It looks like a rocket skipping off the earth's atmosphere, I wonder if it made it to orbit. ...
However, others were more creative with their answers with speculation ranging from UFOs to asteroids, comets and meteorites.
Oh, yeah. That's it. It's a rocket skipping off the atmosphere. It's a satellite falling out of orbit. An asteroid. A comet. A meteorite. After all, those are common. And seeing giant cosmic sperm swimming toward the Earth's egg in the great fallopian tube of the solar system is something you see ever day, right? Regular occurrence. Barely worth mentioning. Who among us doesn't have a video just like this one on our phones?
In case it wasn't obvious, please re-read that last paragraph using my Maximum Sarcasm voice, complete with a full-body eyeroll. Because I'm being ironic here. The fact is, this is unlike anything anyone has seen before. We're just so jaded now we'd rather just fluff off terrifying celestial events like massive space jellyfish zizzing across out ionosphere than see them for what they are. Which is ... something.
I don't know what. I just know that 500 years ago an event like this would get the respect it deserves. Religions would spring up around this thing. Doomsday predictions. Human sacrifices. Wild orgies. We would've recognized this as the harbinger of doom it is, instead of making it seem like a piece of junk or a rock falling to the ground.
Personally, I'm going to go with this being of alien origin. A UJO. Unidentified Jellyfish Object. Our future overlords firing a warning shot across our bow so we'll all submit peacefully before they enslave the healthy to work in their mines and eat the old and weak. Because if it were anything else, we'd have seen one before and we wouldn't be wondering why the sky over Russia looks like a bukkake video.
Either way, if it's a celestial object or an alien weapon, it can't come to finish us off soon enough. And whatever it is that does us in, we can't claim we weren't warned. So long, suckers.