Ding, ding, ding! We have ourselves a bidding war. You may have remembered this blog from yesterday.
Well, let's get one thing straight here. You don't bid on something Messi used and not expect Miss Bum Bum Suzy Cortez to come on in. She loves - and I mean she fucking LOVES Messi.
So if that Playboy model thinks she can swoop in with a $600,000 bid for Messi's used handkerchief, you better believe Miss Bum Bum is showing up. (h/t Egotastic)
I'm going to offer £500,000 (over $685,000) at the auction for Messi's farewell handkerchief. This woman is not a Barça fan or photos with the team shirt, she is a faker who wants to wear the culés to promote herself.
Oh you think just because you're on Playboy and attractive you can get the handkerchief? NOT ON SUZY'S WATCH. You're not even a Barcelona fan. You're a faker! You probably only cheer during the Champion's League. Not like Suzy who has Messi's name tattooed on her own ass. That's dedication. That's how you know you're a real fan. Not because you posed with Barcelona's basketball jersey.
But, hey, wait a minute. The first post on Suzy's Instagram is this.
Club America?!? I get you're mad at Barcelona but what is this? You can't be calling someone a faker and have this out there. Granted there are a million Messi jerseys, my point still stands.
All I know is we have a bidding war. I think there's only one way to settle this. Rough n Rowdy. Winner has to pay way too much money for a used handkerchief. Only correct way to get this done.