Oh Wow Mike Tomlin Has Added To His Arsenal Of "Tomlinisms"

Wow. Every time I see a Tomlinism I think to myself "oh boy there's no way he can top this one", yet ever time I'm proven wrong. 

"Tomlinisms" are a mix of football coach speak and weird analogies your stoner uncle drops to you during a cookout. Combine them together and you get the usual routine from Mike Tomlin at least once a week at a media scrum after practice, the weekly press conference during the regular season, or of course after the games. 

I truly think his goal with these is to get the media member so caught up on the Tomlinism he just spit out that they forget to even think about a follow-up question let alone ask one. How can you follow up on "squirreling those nuts"? You can't. I first saw it and thought "squirreling"? Doesn't he mean "cracking" or "crunching"? By that time it's already too late. They're two maybe even three questions beyond you. 

I always have to tip my hat to Coach T, though, because like I mentioned before it is coach speak, but at least it brings some entertainment value rather than just word garbage being spewed. Why say "I like what I've seen so far, but there's still one more preseason game to decide that" when you can drop "we're still squirreling those nuts"? Why say "we like our depth at receiver" when you could say "when it comes to dinner we'd rather eat at a buffet because there's plenty of options." It makes it more fun for him, more interesting to the media, and more entertaining to the fan. 

Win, Win, Win.