Sometimes You Gotta Eat Crack Cocaine While You're Being Arrested

WALB – A woman wanted for theft tried to eat and swallow crack cocaine while being arrested by officers. Agents with the Douglas-Coffee Drug Unit said Linda Blank, 48, encountered detectives on Cleveland Street near Dewey Avenue. Shortly after, they discovered Blank was wanted for probation violation and for theft by receiving. As Blank was being arrested, agents discovered that she was attempting to chew up and swallow a small quantity of crack cocaine. According to a report, officers were able to stop Blank from swallowing the drugs, and recover them. Blank was later charged with possession of cocaine.

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Step right up Linda Blank and accept your plaque as you enter the mugshot hall of fame! Every single time I look at her stupid face I laugh out loud. Her Flinstones hair, the look on her face where even she’s not sure if she’s excited or about to cry, the entire thing. And of course the fact she’s Crazy Eyes from Orange Is The New Black

is just the icing on top.

But it goes without saying, obviously she did the right thing and tried to swallow all of the crack cocaine when she was being arrested. If it’s in your stomach you can’t be charged for possession, everyone knows that. She just got unlucky and the cops were able to stop her before she got it all down. Pretty bad break for her, but at least she got that sweet mugshot out of it, so I’d say it’s a wash.