The USMNT Celebrated Winning The Gold Cup The Only Correct Way - Chugging Drinks And Bringing The Trophy To Vegas Clubs

Oh hell yeah. Don't tell these guys the Gold Cup didn't matter or that they were our B team. You think they gave a shit? You win a title in Vegas and you celebrate correctly. You start chugging from the Gold Cup. You break out champagne slip n slides and most importantly you go to the club with the trophy. Rub it right in Mexico's face that we're better than you at soccer. Like I said, this is the second time in a month we've beat Mexico with two completely different squads. If that's not improvement and asserting dominance, I don't know what is. The future is here and it's beautiful. We finally have the depth and talent to compete with basically anyone. Yeah, that's right. Basically anyone. These dudes battled who was in front of them and they delivered. I still can't get over this goal from Miles Robinson. 

Perfect pass from Acosta, perfect finish from Robinson. That deserves to be played in Vegas clubs all week until whenever these guys decide to leave. Hell, they should spend a couple extra days just taking the trophy on a tour of the clubs and getting drunk. They deserve it. WE deserve it. All of us that sat there streaming games on some high school field against Trinidad and Tobago to everyone watching us beat Mexico twice. It's beautiful. 

Now I gotta admit drinking out of a trophy is the one gross thing that I'd die to do. There's gotta be no better feeling than putting your lips on a trophy that has touched 1,000 hands. Fill that shit up with some ice cold beer and let me yug it right in the face of whoever we just beat. Don't even just do it in the locker room either. I don't care about sportsmanship. Bring it on the pitch and start drinking from it. Rub it in that we're better than other countries at soccer. Now it's time to qualify for the bullshit Qatar Wold Cup. Step on everyone's throats and keep on partying.